The Boy

Man, am I gonna miss him—The Boy (he wasn’t literally a boy, but an adult, grown one) Watching a video of myself fucking him now is telling of several things—I still have feelings for him. The power of chemical sex is fearsome. To me, he was the most beautiful, perfect bottom. Tying him up, restraining him and using him rough was completely intoxicating...to a level that only now I’m comprehending. I’ve never more like a top than when I fucked him; the sounds of his pleasure told me evidently he enjoyed himself. Fucking him felt the way two men are meant to be together—a****listic, raw, brutal. Which is why is so painful that it’s over now..that is ruined. What the chemicals brought together, the chemicals ruined. He has a man he calls his own. And I was just a passing pleasure to him. Every day it hurts a bit less, but the memory will sure haunt me. Will I find a fit like him again? All the kink we shared together was hot enough to have created a thermonuclear reaction which could have killed us both. It’s hard...to say Goodbye...and to be so attached to him when he clearly is not. I’m the one holding the shit bag of betrayed, hurt emotions. But, man, was his ass worth it. I could fuck him for hours..rock hard..while many other men don’t even make my cock tick. Letting go of the best sex of your life is painful...in a manner some here will understand. It’s like grieving for your sex life—cause it wont be the same moving forward. I just hope someday he can forgive me for what happened that night in that room. I hope he can be at peace. I hope I find my own separate peace...By letting go of that sweet, beefy white ass.