Part three of my crossdressing story...

Sooooooooo where did we leave off....broken hearted and homeless....again.Dont worry it would happen again.For now though.....
First was the year of hell as I called it,yes I am a tad overly dramatic at times,I get that from my Nan,she was an artist so could get away with it,I cant lol.
For some weird reason I blamed my crossdressing on the breakup with my first girlfriend,I dont know why.I think its becouse she had gone off with some normal bloke,so normal and boring,and I wasnt.
Again I had decided to pack in crossdressing as clearly that was to blame.It wasnt,I just thought that at the time.But I took the break up badly,I cant stand to say goodbye,I hate that,I hate endings.I hit the bottle every night I would be hitting a bottle of whisky,and becouse whenever anything bad happens I loose the ability to talk,I go back to being a mute like I was when I was little,I couldnt talk about it,how I felt,and I struggle to know what I feel anyway,all I knew was I hurt like hell.....so had to make the world feel the same way as me.Daft I know.
So I hit back,wandering around town waiting for someone to start something.Not good.But I did come to know the custody sergent really well,ever such a nice bloke.
But I never risked my job,I loved that,always sober clean ready for work every morning.But most mornings I woke up in a gutter somewhere,no idea where I had left the car as I never drank and drove,as I had been hit by a drunk driver once and spent a year in hospital.Everything in life is a slippery slope,so was this.I got more and more into punk as it just spoke to me,fitted my mood as I was so angry but didnt know why and in this self made prison I get shut in when I loose the ability to talk,as that is what its like.But one good thing,even though I was homeless again I never got attacked even when face down in the gutter,as the punk jacket was like a suit of armour,no bugger dared go near you.We were the worst of the worst,or is that the best of the best?
Plus I adored how you could wear what you wanted and no one dared say anything,bonus I didnt have to spike my hair up,it just does that on its own as my hair has always had a mind of its own.
Crossdressing is never far from the heart,it is a part of us,as I might be in a studded jacket anarchy armband,dockers and skin tight pvc bondage trousers (like I hadnt been tied up like a million times before) and a tarten miniskirt that was more like a belt.So its never far away is it lol.
I loved that bit,everyone avoiding me,crossing the road when they saw me coming,everyone scared of me,no fear of attack.That I liked.Im never lonely I do like being alone so it didnt bother me at all.There is peace in solitude that cant be found elsewhere.
I still looked like a girl,but I tried to look manly,scruffy looking,and tried to put on a manly voice by talking deeper when I managed to start talking again,but Id keep forgetting and my normal girly voice would come out.Crap.Forgot.Oh well.I tried to grow a beard and 30 years later Im still waiting for it to kick in!
I altered my walk to be more manly,as I walk more girly than manly normally,and tried to be a lot less animated and keep those wrists up!
I tried anyway.
I started to do manly things,I left makeup and hair behind,lingerie and high heels,and put on boxing,rock climbing,motorbikes,anything manly.
It all came to a head as I hated what I was becoming,it wasnt me,and again I slashed my wrists to end it all,hadnt done that since I was nine.Again,I survived,again thanks to some lass who saved me.Thats why you should always be nice to lasses,as you never know when you will need to be saved by one when you cannot save yourself.
Its all just a mess.But as usual something kicks in,and you become growly as I call it.Head down,just get on with it.We are Yorkshire after all.We come out fighting.Ask the vikings!
I tried to sort myself out,I stopped hitting the whisky,still went to the pub every night,its Yorkshire,its what we do.I dropped boxing as I didnt like that,and took to martial arts,which I LOVED.I did that for donkeys years.I carried on climbing and then moutaineering,then sailing.Anything manly.I loved sailing too much though,still do.That,is freedom.
But Im sorry,but yes here we go again.......
We had just all passed out of our 7 year apprenticeship,Id been going out with a ballerina for nearly a year,I adored her,she was so lovely,but she had to leave to fullfill her dream of touring the world and dancing.We parted,it was upsetting,hard,but we parted lovely,and I wished her well as I couldnt rob her of her dream now could I,and I felt bad that a part of me wanted to.Bloody hell you can do things with a ballerina you cant with mortal women,seriously.........wow.You can literally tie them in knots!Plus I loved how she moved,walked,she didnt move like normal mortals do,even making a cup of tea was a joy to watch,it was like a dance,everything on point and so deft,plus she was so girly girl and loved music as much as I did.Plus she had been on the receiving end of my first girlfriend Dee's pervy tendancies.She had made her do stripshows for her when they were still at school.Weirdly,my next girlfriend had also been on the receiving end of Dee's pervy tendancies,and she had been used as pee bucket while still at school and screwed up her bum,so we had that in common.Welcome to village life!
But I skip ahead...yep I was now a proper Engineer.Lol I know a lot think Im something of a porn star yeah right,some think Im some sort of model (I wish!) or a prostitute.Not sure of how I feel about that last one,but I did used to charge sixpence when I was little for the older boys to mess with me,so I cant really get high and mighty now can I.
It did start off as a joke though,but they took it as I meant it.Idiots.Still it did keep me in polo mints and crisps so not a bad thing.
But yes I am an Engineer,I can bore your tits off about the history of concrete or the development of the rivet or how Whitworth tried to become the dominant standard thread in Britain,or 'bolt wars' as I like to call it.Come on thats interesting!
Ok fine I will stop and go back to crossdressing.....natually when apprentices pass out its celebration time,which ofcourse involves drinking and natually fancy dress.So they were all discussing fancy dress,and I joked thats ok I will just come as I am,a punk as I was still punkyfied then even though I had calmed down a LOT.
This arsed them off,so some joker said we should all dress up in our girlfriends clothes,underwear and all!All apprentices should be caged and studied,really should.
It was voted in,and I wasnt too chuffed about it at all,as I had left that all behind,I didnt want to fall into that again no way.Yet there was that part of me inside my heart that wanted this so much.Oh crap.
Lucky for me Im the same size as a lot of girls,even though most girls are taller and bigger than me.So pinching the girlfriends dress and underwear and shoes isnt a problem.Being little does come in handy sometimes.
Typical me,if Im to do something I have to do it well.Sex,engineering,jobs,driving,sailing,doesnt matter,it always has to be the best I can do,perfection or nothing.
So I got some makeup,just lippy and eyeshadow,liner and masscara and went to town.Did my hair,by which I mean brushed it back and over to one side as I still had to hide behind something of a fringe,and on with the stockings (hold ups) knickers and bra with a couple of socks for shape.The dress was gorgeous,I pinched her cocktail dress,it was hugely flared with girly petticoat built in,and fuzzy velvet on top.I like being fuzzy.I like to feel nice to the touch for people.
High heels ofcourse,but only four inch.
We all met up and what I sight.Imagine 31 blokes there,Im the smallest ofcourse,all the way up to 6ft 5 and 20 stone squeezed into a minidress type thing.Hilarious.It looked like someone had try to dress a grizzly bear,and everything in between.One though,looked nothing as a lad,really plain,but when he turned up everyone questioned their sexuality.Gorgeous!Could not tell he was male.Long evening dress,gloves tiara the works.My tongue was hanging out I know that.Couldnt believe the difference,he was stunningly beautiful no k**ding.We all told him he should stay female as hes hot as hell as a girl,but looks crap as a male.
We had a fantastic night out,full of laughs and beer,and I had forgot just how much I loved being in girl mode.I was actually shocked how much I had missed this,plus safety in numbers meant you could really let your hair down.
It was funny,we were watering the plants down an alley,and one of us was waiting on the street when two dickheads started on him for being in a dress........just as the other 30 of us came out from the alley!It still makes me wet myself laughing at their faces,they knew they were dead lol.We surrounded them,theyve gone all "sorry mate just messing mate didnt mean owt mate" etc,oh dear that wont help you.Youngie the biggest of us and a right character,as he had gone full on over the top drag queen on us,he was loving it,he went up to them,put his massive arms round their necks and growled "hey up darlin how yer fancy a good hard shag".We were helpless at this,it was how terrifyed the dickheads looked.hilarious.
So....for the next half hour or so as we hit a couple more pubs on the pub crawl,we had 6ft 5" ginger scoty Youngie with his arms round this little bullies dragging them around all the while he was winding them up with how hard he was going to shag them later and how he might keep them as his new sex toys.We couldnt stop wetting ourselves.He let them go eventually with a warning.
The moral of this tale is,you really shouldnt bully people,as you never know who is about to come around the corner!
Histerical.Oh he was loving this,going up to people who were staring at him and growling "It just feels right,I dont know why it just feels right",owt for a laugh that was him.
But I was feeling the same,but for real.Ofcourse Im randy as anything as just wearing girls clothes turns me on,Im permantely in a state of high arrousal.Im sat on the bar stool hanging my bum over the back of the seat with my skirt hanging over not tucked under like a proper nice girl but over the back of the stool so Im easy to access.Im sat there hoping for a hand or a cock up there.Bad I know.Yes the old aches for something in me are back with a vengeance,not that they had gone away,I had just tried to ignore them.
I got chatted up!Poor blind soul,or maybe the pub was especially dark,either way mustve been mad.He had no idea I was a boy really,I didnt tell him otherwise just smiled and made small talk,all the other apprentices had seen this so wound me up about dont get drunk and let him shag you,and "we will protect your honour" and such like.Gits.lol.
It was nice to be chatted up I have to say.As I had gone out of my way to be finally manly and leaving all girly notions behind,but I really had forgot just how much I adored being in girl mode,and more,being treated like one.Always made me feel warm and fuzzy inside.
Nothing happened,but someone lifted my dress up for a good look at my bum and I didnt know what they were doing so everyone in the pub got a good luck at what I have to offer.Cheeky sods.I also got smacked on the bum once,groped twice, and in one pub as I went to the loo some little git lifted up my dress and smacked my bum so hard the whole pub heard it.I went bright red!So embarrasing!I just ran off to the loos dying of embarrasment,as for me the worse bit was I had liked it.That was awful,as I had told myself so many times I had done with all that.It was a phase,it was just teenagers experimenting thats all.I was k**ding myself ofcourse,at the time I knew I was k**ding myself,deep down even I knew I was trying to convince myself and failing miserably.
Nothing else happened,and it all ended up with us all drunk as skunks and having a right laugh,perfect end to the aprenticeship.

Not for me,those feelings are bad.Cant ignore them.Cant shake them.Memories of my first girlfriend Dee's pervy times are back,dressing me up,girly times shopping for clothes and makeup,teaching me all about sex,treating me as a girl the whole time,it was all right back again........and how much I loved being shagged,and anal orgasms,and that one time when I had both the male orgasm and male one at the same time.Felt like I was going to implode!!Damn it its all back again.
Try to ignore it?Good advice.Tried that.Didnt work.Try manly pursuits and company.Yep did that,didnt work.Anything else?Try growing up and being resposible dependable and lots of other able's equally as boring.Never in a million years.
Oh dear he we go again....I pinched a pair of my girlfriends knickers and started wearing them under my work clothes.Scary,but thought I could get away with it.Then Im buying stockings and wearing them under my work clothes,then a padded bra (no more socks!!) slippery slope here we go.It didnt help my girlfriend having her white tutu hung up on the wardrobe door,all the time Im wanting,needing to put it on.I did resist....till she hung up her black tutu as she was playing black swan in swan lake.Its no good its going on!Oh yeah.It is a lot like an addiction I think in some ways this crossdressing thing.You forget how enjoyable it is,how wonderful it feels,how it makes you feel permanetly aroused,I mean constantly!
It doesnt help with everyone asking me "are you a girl?".I wish I had a pound for every time I was asked that.It always annoyed me,becouse if I answered no,they looked at me like I had escaped from a rubber room.If I said yes,they were happy with that.If I answered "yes why?",they explained they werent used to seeing women in male job roles.I always joked that we can also vote and drive cars as well!
Can you see how confusing it always was.Im the only one everyone thinks is a girl,Im the only one who loves dressing up in girls clothes makeup and all things girly,yet Im a genetic male with a girls figure and do a male job with long blond hair and smaller than everyone else.Its like permantely asking yourself who am I what am I?Drives you mad.
Anyway my girlfriend buggered off to tour the world dancing,just after she had talked me into going back home as my father was dying of asbestosis and my mother couldnt cope so needed help.My sister as usual was no where to be seen so it would be muggings as usual.
I hadnt been back since I ran away 6 years earlier.Weird going back,standing at the bottom of the drive looking up at the house,looking at my old bedroom window that I had climbed out of and escaped into the night all those years ago.So strange a feeling.It seemed like a million years ago now.
I knocked on the door.Weird.Im laughing at it now,to knock where once before I had just gone in at will.My mother answered the door "oh so your back then" and turned and went upstairs to see to my father.Yep Im back.My sister was there for once "oh so your back then" "yep".
It turned out they hadnt been out looking for me after I ran away "good ridance to bad rubbish" to quote my sister plus "we knew you would be allright and its what you wanted".Errr yeah,and being woken up by rats knawing on you making you feel like a piece of worthless garbage is the same feeling as Im having now.
Its nice to be missed isnt it.
Anyway I cut the grass,cleaned the house,it was bad,and got some shopping in and did all I could to help.Its what I do.Im like a 50s housewife,really am.No joking that is the real me Im afraid.
My father died,we never made up,never got on.No idea if he was ever proud of me,dont think so.I think more like despaired at me more like.No idea.I hated being a disapointment,I hated being born different from everyone else,I hated looking like the wrong sex.But I couldnt help being me.
I bought high heels,was never in,always out,bought some skater dresses,pub every night,bought more shoes,more lingerie,more makeup...never in always out but always in boy mode.I never went out dressed as a girl.Most days I would have stockings and lingerie like a baby doll on under my work clothes all day,but I kept all this hidden.My dirty little secret.
I started to dress up and sneak out the house and walk the streets in girl mode again like I had with Dee.It wasnt the same on my own but I still loved doing it.I even went up Sheffield on my own,dressed.It wasnt the same.Its like something was missing.
My nan and uncle were always wear what you want do what you want,sod everyone else.Mother quietly despairs probably.
I had sent one of my friends to see Dee to get my photos back from the professional shoots I had done,and the two vids we had made.I told her to offer Dee anything,any amount up to my car.As thats all I had to give.But she would not part with them becouse she knew I wanted them so badly,as it had been the only time I had been happy with the way I looked.That hurt,that killed me.I wanted them so badly.Oh well.
I went out with a couple of girls,boring,they didnt do anything for me.It was like the lights had gone out of the world.
Then I was sat on the wall having a fag as nothing else to do when I saw M,a lad from school.He was in my class and was the fat k** of the school,where I had been the small k** of the school.So something in common.He had long black curly hair,proper girl boobs ,they were huge,hairless and had a little cock,he was the spit of his sister.If you put him in skin tight jeans and a loose blouse you would not be abel to tell one from the other.same hair figure face everything.Id always fancied him as he was one of the girly boys at school,there was only three of us.
When I had done one of my strip shows for everyone in the changing room with my cock between my legs so I looked just like a proper girl much to everyones delight (except the teacher ofcourse) I had been looking at him most times as I slowly dropped my towel exposing myself to him,all the while looking at his big girly body gorgeous big boobs and that little cock.It made me smile when I saw it go hard at what I was doing and him trying to hide it just as Im belted with training shoe on my head from the teacher for performing.He never did miss,honestly not once.
I had had fantasies about me and him together,M not the teacher!Especially him and his sister together,he would be shagging me from behind stood up (one of my fave posistions) as his sister coming in and catching us,looking shocked,then smiling and then slinking over to join us,she would be sucking me off while he pounded me away,then I would do her as he did me at the same time.Oh yeah.Well I know what I will be treating myself to later!
I said hello,and he sat down and we chatted a while about general blah blah.I kept looking down at his lovely girl boobs and remembering him naked in the showers.I know Im wicked.
We went back to my house as mom was over at nans for the day and my sister had buggered off so home alone.Excellent.We sat on the bed and listened to the radio and chatted about school days and all what we had been up since.
Something shocked me,aparently everyone knew you could mess about with me for a sixpence!Arrgghh!I thought it was a secret and only a few of us knew about any of that.Crap.I went bright red.
I joked if it was common knowledge then how come he hadnt come up to the top of the field with a sixpence then,like I was insulted or something.He joked back he had never got a sixpence.We laughed.I went bright red again at that.
Then come the wicked thoughts,we have a good few hours before my mom comes back home,we are all alone,so I start to steer the conversation.Thats bad even I know that but I wanted to get my paws on him so badly it hurt.Id fancied him for years,and he was so girly like me,looked like one,so polite quietly spoken and had these killer curves and a big fat bum I just wanted to sink my teeth into.Mostly I just wanted,had to,get my paws on him as he looked so squigy and soft.As to me touch,and sound mean so much to me.As I didnt talk till I was nine years old or thereabouts I communicated with touch.I would gently touch someones lips with my finger meaning shut up you are annoying me.Or I would gently touch their shoulder meaning I want something which could be food or drink.I would make my eyes go big if it was a cuppa I was after,or suck my cheeks in a little for food.Else I would take someones hand and do big eyes meaning I want to go somewhere,or a touch on someones hair meant I love you.Things like that,so touch meant the world to me.Its how I show how I feel as I dont have the words....ever.For example,to just gently just a little pull someones hair at the back while kissing them so their head naturally tilts back so you can seamlessly slide your lips down the front of their exposed neck while breathing softly warmly out at the same time.....drives them into extasy and is me really showing them I like them,a lot.Thats how I talk.Its how I express myself as I cant talk really even now.Unless Ive had a few beers then I cant shut up lol.
You can imagine how much I want to feel what squigy and soft feels like then.
Yes Im wicked in steering the conversation.I steer it back to me kissing the older boys and stuff,and how I used to do my little strip shows for everyone in the changing room all the while trying to make out I regretted it like what was I thinking.He remarked he had seen me and Dee in the pub fancy dress,that time I wore a really short flared dress and every time I turned around you could see my stocking tops and suspenders.I knew that already,why do you think I used to turn around so quickly.I mean really.Like I didnt know.Durrr.
We went quiet for a moment,and I took a chance....."I still do it you know" as he had told me earlier he hadnt had a girlfriend and was quite resentful no girl wanted to go out with him becouse he was fat,and he hadnt even done it.Just like any criminal genious Im taking advantage of this by pushing me,into the ring.
"I still do it,you know......dressing up sort of thing,I know its sad but thats me"."Ive always done it,dont know why,always have.Dont tell anyone will you!?"
He said he wouldnt."You really do still dress up like that?"
"Yep".
He looked at the floor and had gone red,I couldnt tell if he was turned on embarrased or what.I thought what the hell nowt to loose I can beat him up if need be so no worries....hehe
I touched his hand softly (see what I mean I still talk mostly with touch to this day) and did big eyes looking up into his face,"will you wait here?"
"what for" he replied looking puzzled,"I want to show you something."
He looked worried!I touched his cheek softly which is me saying dont worry its nothing bad,thats me reasuring someone without stupid words getting in the way.
I went out and over to my room,leaving him in my sisters bedroom as Im not messing my bedroom up!Yep 50s housewife through and through.
I didnt know what to put on....panic......arrgghhh....stuff it.Nervous,dragging my clothes and lingerie out from off a hidden shelf under my bed I had made for just such things.See being an Engineer comes in handy.
I went for black lacey hold up stockings,black string bikini (no socks this time) and blue miniskirt pleated,with a blue tight top.Did my hair,by which I mean I brushed it and took out my pony tail,bit of lippy mascara as didnt want to keep him waiting too long,high heels on....panic nervous what if he laughs,what if he storms out....I must be mental.....still you never know....
Stood outside the door shaking like a leaf.......I go in and stood there then did my glamour puss showgirl pose,you know the one with hand on hips,hips over to one side,one hand in the air arm bent."What you do think?" I whispered.He looked gone out and just stared.I could tell he liked what he saw,or I convinced myself of that.
I slinked over and sat beside him on the bed,double crossing my legs becouse I can,and becouse it flashes my stocking tops off.Im a slut I know I know.
"Look stockings!" I proclaimed "eeer yeah err...nice..." was all I got back.Oh dear.Talk about not giving a girl a bone or what.
"Do you like it?" I asked softly leaning in a little bit,no answer."I dont look too hideous do I?" I asked getting a bit arsey "no not at all,just cant believe its you".
"Yep,this is me,this is the real me.I know its daft,its stupid but I like it,always have and its not like Im hurting anyone or doing anything wrong you know" as I try to defend my crossdressing.
He says nothing.Just keeps looking up and down at me,but mostly staring at my stockinged legs.
I notice,so I uncross and cross them the other way giving a little leg show just as years before Dee had taught me.Thanks Dee it came in handy over the years,thanks for that anyway.
I put my hand on his,"its ok,no one has to know,its our secret ok,just ours,me and you...just please dont tell anyone I do this.....please" as I do big eyes looking up into his as I plead my case.
"I wont tell" he says,I reply quietly "thank you" and squeeze his hand.
"You can kiss me if you want....you dont have to..." I whisper trying my best to purr,he says nothing.I take his head in my hands lifting it as I slide a finger down his cheek to his jaw infront of his ear cupping his head,yes I was taught well....."I am like a girl you know" as I carry on defending my case "except I do things a girl wouldnt do" I say with a wicked smile.He smiles back.
"No one has to know,I wont tell anyone,you wont so.....why not.Tell you what,try it,one little peck,if you dont like it thats it no probs.At least you will know,and so,will I"That last bit I sighed out as I wanted to be kissed badly.I love to be touched.
"Put your hands on me".I dont give up do I!Im like a dog with a bone here and I do not sound well even I know that hehe.
I take his chubby little hands and put them on my stocking leg "see soft......silky".I get a "mmm yeah" back.Wow.Dont go over board will you.
He wont move his hand so I slowly move up my leg to my bare thigh,I feel him try to pull away,I hold his hand firmly,Im thinking youve no chance darling,you are going no where my friend.
"Its ok,hey dont look so sad,it doesnt mean anything,its just fun nowt else" as I stroke his cheek and round into his hair,I move in and whisper into his ear "just please dont hate me" breathing heavier than I need to for effect.He turned round to look me in the eyes,just as I he should as now our lips are only just a kiss away.Works every time.
He managed to get out a "I dont ha.." as I moved in and kissed him gently on the lips as I hold my breathe,then slowly pulled away,just a little and look into his eyes "see it didnt hurt did it".I get no reply,dont give him chance to as I move in again and kiss him,only this time for longer and I have my hands in his hair,oh hes going no where I can tell you that."See,its nice,doesnt mean anything" I reasure him "its just like kissing a real girl no different".I smile hugely "youre a good kisser you know".He goes embrassed.I appologise for embrassing him but tell him he really is good,and kiss him again as I gently pull on his hair so he naturally follows it falling back onto the bed.I dont want to feak him out by going ontop of him so I fall back with him still kissing and fall at his side so we are sideways on.To be on top couldve feaked him out,couldnt risk that.
We kissed,snogged,I moved his hands onto to my boobs as I felt his.They were huge,so so soft and squigy.Loved them.Couldnt leave them alone,and then hands back into his hair,I love long curly hair.It doesnt suit me as Dee once permed my hair,it did not go well.I think we both wake up screaming to this day.
I up the anty.I slide my leg over his,ok so far so good,and slowly run my leg up and down his,then higher,then over his cock.I can feel his is rock hard,but its only a little one.I dont mind,big or small doesnt matter to me one little bit,really.As long as its a nice looking one,Im happy.After all Im always about giving the pleasure not getting it.
He gets a bit skittish but I keep reasuring him its ok,then I let it slip "Ive always fancied you",he is shocked,"who do you think the little strip shows in the changing room were for eh?" meaning him.
I got my hands on his thing after I felt it safe to do so,that I had worked him up so much he couldnt say no,it all fitted in my hand nearly.It was about five inch long.Its enough to give a gurl a treat.Least I can get that in my mouth!
I kissed him deeply,got him really worked up before I slinked down his front as Im having that in my mouth Im thinking.He tries to stop me going down on him,ha youve no chance sweety,I dodge the hand stop and get down to his thing and kiss it."dont worry I dont bite" I joke,"well not today anyway" with a wicked smirk.
I take it in my mouth all the way,he rolls back,yep hes mine now,hes putty.I suck him off doing all the little tricks I had been taught,like the little finger on the vein to make it pop as you work it,the timing of my breathing and where Im breathing from to make m breath hotter than normal,and using my tongue for effect from underneath like a litle playful lick of his balls as I go down fully,all a good gurl should know.
Damn it a pube!Urgh.Yuck yuck yuck.Hate that.Nothing worse than a pube in your teeth.Urgh.There we go,got it,gone,carry on.
I feel him go tense,here we go.err no I dont think so.Id wanted to know what real cock felt like since always,I thought no way youre going to cum,Im having this.I stop sucking his cock and start kissing it,and around it,damn it another pube.Flaming hell.Urgh.
I feel him relax again the urge to cum is going as Ive taken away the cause eg my sucking mouth,I sneakily pull my bikini bottom to one side,and start to finger myself to get myself wet ready.
I carry on stroking and kissing his thighs and cock,then I slide up and kiss him.As its ace to kiss someone after sucking their cock as it makes your lips a lot hotter than normal,then you go back down and up again for a snog,its makes just simple kissing so much more.
Im ready,Im wet,yes Im afraid my bum does function like a really pussy,and Im not the only one like that so Im not a total freak of nature you know,I slide back up,hes thinking Im coming up for another kiss.Oh no my friend,nope.I slide up over his cock and we are face to face,as I smile,look into his eyes,then slide back down a little with his cock still in my hand as I position it outside my hole,he is about to panic and wuss out but I dont give him the chance as I just slide right down onto it.
Its in me.
He is inside me.
Thats weird.That is a weird feeling.Its a bit starkling to say the least.
Well I slowly grind up and down on him loving how it felt inside me,and I couldnt leave his boobs alone!So soft and squigy,loved em,could not leave those alone,and loved how soft smooth and bouncy he was.It may not look attractive to some,but it feels amazing and touch is everything to me as you know.It was like riding a bouncy castle.Loved it.Weee bouncee.
The down side was my legs are spread so far apart I felt like I was going to split in half!He was wide and I struggled a bit with one leg each side of him,but again on the plus side he cant get away hehe.
I do leave his big boobs alone now and again to run my hands up his back,down the side of his neck,into his long curly hair with every now and again cupping his head in my hands and kissing him frenching him,running my wet mouth down the front of his neck as I gently lower his head back down and grind him some more,or change into what I call bouncy girl.I do love being a bouncy girl I have to admit.He wasnt very big so I couldnt go nuts up and down,but it was enough to slowly go up and down on his shaft then grind,snog,fondle up down and grind again.
He came in me.That was a suprise,I wasnt expecting that.Its me,Im always suprised when someone comes dont know why.I think he had been saving that up for a while,it felt like loads splashing up there,and suprising how far it felt it was shooting up deep inside me like up around my ribcage,not to mention how hot it felt,not like when its on your face or in your mouth.
He didnt buck like I do,just a few grunts and shakes really,but loved how he grabbed my waist so tight,really really tight,and held me down onto his cock so I couldnt get away from it.I liked that!
That was nice,my first girly boy.I couldnt help smiling like mad,I was so happy,and very red in the face as it was a bit err unexpected.
But I wasnt done with him yet,I lifted him up and snogged him some more as I didnt want any talking,and I started to grind him again,I felt it going hard again inside me,yep sloppy seconds,Its the best really is.
It was a nice position,him sat up,me on his lap legs spread so wide I thought I was going to give birth any minute,his big fat belly squashing my cock so much just added to it all.I did grind and ride him a good while longer till he came in me again.I didnt dare get my cock out the whole time as I didnt want to put him off or anything.Needless to say I was rock hard the whole time,and I had leaked a lot of precum as I usually do,I leak like a sive,but cant seem to spell it.
So a bit of a sticky mess but didnt care.
"Soooooo......"I said as I held his head in my hands staring into his eyes,his cock still in me after he had come in me the second time,"Sooooooo,now youve had your wicked way with me,are you going to see me again?" all said with a huge cheeky smile on my face."maybe".Wow talk about give a gurl a bone why dont you.I see why women despair at blokes a lot of the time,I really do lol.
"oh,only maybe?"I replied sarcy pussly,"what do I have to do to convince you then",again said with a wicked grin.
He just smirked blushed and didnt know what to say.Thatll do me.Thats a yes then.
After a bit of hugging and kissing for half an hour after,as I love to be hugged after and kissed,I got off him and quickly put my hand over my hole to stop all his cum running out,I wasnt quick enough and some fun out onto the bed,but it was my sisters bed so not too bothered about that.Look,it wasnt mine,so thats ok hehe.
I then went off to the bathroom to clean up a tad,I love to hold their hand as I go,slowly letting their fingers part with mine as I walk away knowing theyre staring at my bum and legs.
I took some tissue back,and he tried to grab it to clean himself up as I had got my wetness all over his bits,I yanked back the tissue "errr no,my job...." I said smiling like a cheshire cat,and started to slowly clean his bits,well dry them more like.I know I know Im wicked,yes ofcourse its another excuse to play with it some more hehe.I kissed it goodbye like I always do,and put it away and pulled his trousers up and zipped him up,with a little kiss on it before giving him a huge smile and diving on him again,rolling us both onto our sides so we can just hug.
"what about you?" he asked,"what about me?.....oh dont worry I can see to myself later" I replied.I do sound like a real woman at times lol.
I didnt want to get it out,freak him out or put him off me or anything like that,just couldnt risk it,but nice of him to ask.
I keep calling him a he,but to my eyes he was a girly boy.I saw him as feminine.Thats not a bad thing at all,he would have made the most gorgeous cd/tv,no doubt about that at all.
"dont tell anyone" he kept saying,"I wont dont worry,wont tell a soul,I dont talk anyway so dont worry!" I tried to reasure him over and over again.
He made some excuse to go,so I kissed him on the cheek and told him again no one would ever know,it would be between us and thats it.I asked again when I would see him,he said soon and let himself out,leaving me just stood there feeling a bit used,bit let down,very wet,leaking cum everywhere,yet warm and happy inside,overjoyed I had made him hard,and made him cum,twice...I had done that,I had made him do that,which made me so very happy,and glad that I had liked a real cock in me as I had wondered.Its better than a rubber one thats for certain.Tons better.Then I had to just wank myself stupid while I relived what had just happened over in my head.And then again.
Oh go on just one more then..
I didnt see him the next day,or the next,I wandered around the village,nope no sign.Im getting the feeling hes avoiding me.But the good thing about a village is,you know where everyone lives,so I knew where his house was.
I wandered past,but no sign.Stuff it Im off to the pub,called in on one of my friends,she wasnt doing anything so we went and played some pool at the pub and downed a few beers,putting the world to rights and having a few giggles,all the while deep down Im feeling awful like a piece of garbage again.
I didnt see him for some days after,then as usual I get stroppy and call round his house,Im in boy mode ofcourse.His sister answered the door,always fancied her,she was a couple of years older and was the spit of her brother,you could not tell them apart.I did have a fantasy about he would be doing me standing up,she would come in and catch us,shocked,then smiling,joined in by sucking me as I get pounded from behind.Loved that idea.
Anyway she let me in,we talked for a bit had a giggle or two and I went up to his bedroom where he had been hiding.I wanted to know what was up,not nasty or anything daft like that,I just wanted to know are we seeing each other again,or was that it.I just wanted to know thats all.
I sat down on his bed next to him and smiled "hi",or if you speak Yorkshire that would be "o reyt" in our language,"ah yer doo in".
"O reyt a suppos" was his reply.
"whats up?" I asked as something was.We talked,and to cut a long story short,he was horrified he was now gay,as back then that was the worst thing to be,according to some.I always thought if you are gay you are gay,if you are straight you are straight.Its the way you are,nowt wrong with that.So whats the biggy?
But to many at the time it was a terrbile thing.Stupid or what.
So I went into agony aunt mode,as I am mothering I know...so I did the gay test as I call it...."do you fancy men?"
"no".
"Do you find big muscles and tattoes sexy?"
"no"
"Do you find big hairy chests sexy?"
"no"
"do you find big torsos gruff voices and big hairy legs sexy?"
"no"
"yeah,you are not gay my friend".
He replied he must be becouse of what we had done.
Agony aunt mode again.....
"do I have a gruff voice....do I have a big hairy chest....or big hairy legs....do I have a big bushy beard....do I have a huge torso....no ofcourse not.Do I look act move or even sound like a bloke?No.So no,you are not gay,you are in fact straight.You are attracted to femininity thats all,so am I."
"but youve that" pointing to my bits,"well youve got one too.....plus youve massive boobs!I havent so you cant complain" I said jokingly.
It broke his mood anyway,he didnt seem too bad after that.Still complained he hadnt done anything sex wise,and I had done all sorts.He seemed a bit threatened?Or intimidated.I told him I had hardly done anything,and that was the past and we all have a past,I cant change it,all we have is here on in,and thats all that mattered.I did say if he didnt want anything to do with me thats fine,really was.Im not going to get arsey or anything daft.If he wants to see me.Fine.If he wants to do it again,excellent.
He did want to see me again,and as I pointed out,he was a girly boy just like me,he fancied me I fancied him,we werent doing anything wrong or hurting anyone so wheres the harm?So,we can both miss out,both be miserable,or we can go out and enjoy each others company and we dont have to do anything if he doesnt want,its up to him not me.
He seemed to like that,and so we started going out together in secret.
I would park up and wait for him,he would pull in behind my car and I would get out and get in his car.Well it was a van ish thing,like a people carrier thing,ugly thing it was,nothing like my X1/9,which was about to be traded in for a MR2.Yes I do love my mid engine cars,still do,still have one even now.Anyway....sometimes we would just talk have a laugh,sometimes we would do it,as I used to put on lingerie stockings etc under my boy clothes and whip them off when I got in his car,or have a dress under my boy clothes,so whenever we were together I was in girl mode.Sex in a car was always one of my faves.
We did it often,not as often as I wouldve liked,but I didnt mind.His sex drive was normal,unlike mine.He was also quite normal too,no kinky stuff at all,all just normal kiss kiss grope grope boink boink,with me doing all the hard work as usual.Sometimes we did missionary,which is a fave of mine too,I loved being squashed under his weight and my legs flailing about in the air,streched beyond belief as thats a wide load on me.I must admit even though no kinky stuff,I didnt mind as I was loving being screwed by another girly boy as I called it back then,and that walk of shame back to my car knowing Im filled with his 'babies' as I called sperm back then.Wonderful feeling,so so so hot.
But he wouldnt do anything with my cock.Sometimes he would play with it a bit,but thats it.He didnt mind it on show,but didnt want to do anything with it,so I had to see to myself after I had emptied him,which did suck a bit,as I wanted so badly to stick it in his big round bum.It was huge,round,and just asking for it.But he liked watching me put on a sex show for him in the passenger seat.Odd.
I did try to talk him into crossdressing but he wouldnt have it.He did wear some girly panties once,oh boy did I screw him into the ground for that,but that was it.
Also he never wanted to be seen with me in public,not in girl mode anyway.I did ask if it was becouse I looked like a bloke in a dress,but he reasured me I did look just like a girl,you couldnt tell what I really had between my legs,yet he wouldnt be seen with me in girl mode for some weird reason.So,its ok to screw me,cum in me,but not ok to be seen with me?Errr.....and thats ok?I asked if he was ashamed of me or something,was it becouse I was little?Am I too animated?Tiny boobs?Or is it the usual dumb blonde rubbish?As I do have a brain,I did have an IQ of 139 when I was 9 years old you know and always got 100% in my exams,and I had taught myself to read and write too!So there is a brain in there somewhere.
What was it?Why didnt he want to take me to a pub or something?
He would just grunt something or change the subject.
I found out ages later,I finally got it out of him,it was becouse he was worried we would be attacked for being girly boys,and he couldnt let go of the fact I was male,but he loved doing it,it felt right,he fancied me like mad,wanted us to be together,loved how I always made him laugh,and the daft things like I would bake him some of my famous shortbread.
He was just hung on the fact I have a cock,oh and it was bigger than his.I told him it didnt matter,big small who cares,long as its nice looking and attached to a girly boy,gimme!hehe.
But he never could let go the fact I had a cock,and paranoid we would be attacked the minute we got out the car.I did point out we would be ok as no one could tell if I was arthur or martha and I can take care of myself,but sadly no.
He used to talk for ages after we had done it,I would be snuggled up under the travelling rug,arm around him,head on his chest listening to his breathing and heart beating,happy and content,full of his babies,lovely place to be that was.Warm and safe.Wonderful.He would rattle on for ages,about us running off together to some far off country
where we could be together properly,get married,live together and no one would judge us.
Hello reason!I thought.There we go thats it,its being judged,what people might think,so thats why he didnt want to be seen with me in public becouse a lot knew what I got up to when I was little with the other boys,and how I went out in girls clothes with Dee to the pub and up to Sheffield,so they would know what we are up to.
Ok then,scheming mode on....
Back then,I think they still do it,but in Bakewell they had a ball,midsummer ball.Id always wanted to go,never been to a ball before and I like the idea of getting poshed up and a bit of dancing or something,plus good excuse to blow lots of money on a dress!Yaaaay.Cant have enough dresses.
I called his bluff......after we had done it and Id been especially nice to him if you know what I mean,I mentioned it was the midsummer ball coming up and I wanted to go.
Oh and did I mention HE is taking me?
That woke him up!
He was all no way never in a million years,I was all please please please please please please,he was all no chance,I was all no one knows us,no one will know,we will look just like any other couple,he was still no way no chance,so I was all "dont make me give you a tour of my scars,becouse you know I will".
Its a jokey thing I do,usually when Im after something or Ive had another crazy idea or something,its so I get my own way,or try to,but in a messing about not being serious kind of way you understand.
But it is done jokingly never in a serious way as Im never serious,just cannot take myself seriously at all,plus I love to mess about and make pople laugh.
So I start.....I sit up and doing a daft posh labortory assistant voice I start..."starting off top to bottom....here just below my left eye is a stab wound from a stanley knife....and on the right just infront of my ear is another,again from a stanley knife.....then on the left of my neck is a red mark from where a red hot poker was held on my neck when I was little...then moving down we have a couple of stab wounds on the chest,then a collection of three on my girl boobs,those were all part of one attack ofcourse...then thats where my first girlfriend stabbed me when we broke up...oh thats a slash wound from a kitchen knife...." and so on.
By the time I get to the gunshot wound on my arm or the dreaded 'zipper incident' where I got my cock stuck in my zipper and had to yank them apart,they are usually grimising and pulling all kinds of faces in horror "ok fine fine just shut up".hehehe love it when a plan comes together.Works every time.
He already had a dinner suit or whatever theyre called,I call them penguin suits.I ofcourse had to go shopping.......Debenhams here we come....
Took ages to find something....and then I saw it.The perfect wedding dress.Gorgous.High low hem,lots of sparkly bits,spaghetti straps,lace short sleeves,oh mommy its so me.Shame it hasnt a splt up to my waist,oh well cant have everything.Yikes its not cheap,but it is in my size.....hmmm....I will put it back on the rack and surround it with lots of ugly dresses to keep it safe while I decide.Oh come on weve all done it.
I found a lovely evening dress,I still have it actually,more shockingly it still fits me.Only had it on the other day for no reason at all.
It was so soooooo soft,like it was made by kittens for kittens,so stretchy,split up to the thigh,slutty Im liking this,and bordot top half all lacey which contasted lovely with the smooth black silky rest of the dress.It wouldnt hide anything,size 10,bit baggy around the middle but not bad,me like.Ofcoure I will need new shoes for no reason aswell.....51/2" heel,suede,strappy......oh and that wedding dress and that necklace is nice.....
Yikes,that was a big shopping bill!!Why do shop assistants always think Im buying for my girlfriend?
I tried my best with my hair and makeup.I even put blusher on,and I usually forget that.Eyeshadow,lippy,tried doing eyeliner,failed miserably as I looked like a racoon,so just mascara then,thank goodness I have stupidly long eyelashes......brushed my hair,but unusally I brushed it behind my ears so no fringe to hide behind,dangly earings and my new tiara.Told you it was an expensive shopping trip!
I couldnt decide between holdups or suspender belt as the dress clung like mad,you could see everything,so had to tuck urgh.Oh well.I went with hold ups as it was obvious through this dress,and the usually padded bra strapless,which then got ditched as I wanted to be natural for tonight,I wanted to be me warts and all.I had tight black silk knickers on so not worried about anything falling out,checked myself in the mirror,hated how I looked no change there but kinda liked having my little boobs on show,you couldnt miss my nipples through this dress but its enough I thought,plus the slit in the dress can flash my stocking tops if I want to give someone a smile inside.
I LOVE my tiara!Its funny,Im laughing now at it,I hated being called a pocket princess,it always made me give them a hard stare like paddinton bear wouldve.Why pocket princess?grrrrrrr.Whoever came up with that name for me is going to die.Pocket princess my arse.
Yet here I was being just that and couldnt help but smile inside and out.Neckless on,rings on,fags lighter keys....well Im ready,only took an hour and a half........and the rest.
We had a taxi take us,one of those posh taxi's,you know the ones that dont traffic d**gs and weapons,and have less vomit in them,yep those ones...
I must admit he did srub up well.He looked well posh in his penquin suit,sorry dinner jacket thingy.I know I dont know anything about boy clothes sorry.
I asked if I would do giving him a little twirl.He smiled and said I scrubbed up well too.He liked the tiara.
Ofcourse he should,its a tiara!Its like a dog having two tales!Doesnt get better than a tiara.
Yes I do suppose I am a pocket princess.Oh well.Still dont like being called that lol.
So anyway.....have you ever had a perfect evening?A perfect date?A perfect night?This was just such a thing.He was nice and charming and all gentlemanly opening the taxi door for me and closing it,I ofcouse got in bum first,legs together knees together,up swing and theyre in just like a proper lady does.I did feel a bit exposed just having knickers on and nothing else,and my little pokies on show.Hmm.Still nothing that beer wont fix.
It seemed a long drive,we chatted to the driver like yer do in these parts,and finally got there about an hour later.I can do that drive in 20 minutes!
He opened the door when we got there and held my hand as I tried to get out the car.Damn this dress is long,not used to having my dress trailing on the floor.I scooped it up and looked around to see what the other guests were doing with their long evening dresses.Aparently its ok for them to drag in the dirt you just hold a bit of the dress and pretend to lift it up.Ok then.
We got dropped off in the carpark and we walked to the hall,as that was the done thing.There is something about Bakewell at night I love.In the day it smells of fish and chips,nowt wrong with that luv,but its full of folks dogs and rug rats,or carpet critters if you prefer.
But at night,its pitch black,there is no one around,so so quiet,you can hear the river Derwent off to your right,and its beutifully lit by the street lamps,its magical,there is something in the air,the atmosphere,just magical.Loving it already.
We were passed by a couple "good evening" they both said warmly "evening" we replied.My little pokies were stuck out like chapel hat pegs,it was cold,and the lady that just greeted us had such huge boobs you couldve parked your bike in them!Look at my crappy things.She was all curves,me just a string of pee that couldnt even fill a size 10 dress,plus she was taller than me and I had bigger heels on!
Didnt feel good.But she did look so elegant in that long peach evening dress I must admit.Still I had a tiara on!Did I mention my tiara?Mustve.You know,my tiara?I did say I had a tiara on?hehe.
Oh by the way if anyone dares call me a pocket princess in the comments,there will be trouble.lol
As we walked arm in arm to the hall I ofcourse had wicked thoughts...."oh can we pretend to be lord and lady asswipe?....come on be a right laugh....or you can be barron von something or other and I can be your bit of fluff.....or introduce yourself as Chester,Chester Draws.Thats always good for a giggle....or.....I know lets tell everyone we are brother and sister,then make out to really freak em out come on be a right laugh".Im chattering away like a possessed monkey.
Ofcourse he had to reign me in...."right,best behavoir ok....no messing about,no pretending to be princess freya of norway or whatever youve got in that mad head of yours,no flashing anyone to give them a treat,no taking your dress off for no reason cos I know you,no nothing.Bestest possible behavoir ok."
Grumpy sod.Fine I will behave.Fine.Boring.Fine I will be good.Did I mention my tiara?
He sighed."just please behave for once in your life"."but I come out in a rash" I replied.Dont know why he kept sighing.Did I mention my tiara?
So I decided I would be good,plus we had never been out as a couple before so was curious to see how it would go.Weird isnt it,I wasnt at all worried about being taken for a boy in a dress at all.How odd.
We got greeted by some huge bloke on the door,told him our names,tickets,and we were in.Everyones talking posh,everyones all glamed up,live band,well posh.I heard some woman talking about dogs,only she called them "dowgs".I ofcourse lept on this,"whats a dowg?Is it like a dog?Whats a doowwwgg.My doowg is flaring up.Cant sit down for my dooowg playing up"."behave!" I got growled back.Misery guts.
But I can behave and did.We got our drinks,I wanted a pint but noooooo had to have a glass of wine.Urgh its like varnish.Hate wine.Sod it Im having a pint.....why not.Lots of the girls I know drink pints,its about time everyone did.
He quietly despaired at me I think,but I held my pint glass with both hands and supped it slowly like a proper lady.I look cute when I hold it with both hands anyway so why not.
He lightened up a bit,and we chatted and giggled as I started taking some of the snobs off as I do have a talant for taking people off,but I only do it to those I dont like or who take themselves seriously or think they are someone.Dont like stuck up people.But some were nice and came over and chatted with us,he was worried I might become princess freya of sweden or something daft but no,I was charming polite and well spoken,I even when asked where we were from I didnt answer "the other side of Sheffield,you know,the part thats usually on fire" as I usually do.
We talked small talk with a few couples,yet no one mentioned my tiara which miffed me a bit.Did I mention it?
He talked mostly,I did now and again,and hit it off with a lady that lived locally the lucky cow.She was well posh,rich but down to earth and just lovely.We swapped recipes when she found out I could cook and bake etc,as not only my famous shortbread but my yorkshire puds made from scratch ofcourse,I told her the secret to good puds is mix them the day before and put it in the fridge over night,thats the secret to yorkshire puds,oh and dont be afraid of the salt,yes we will all die at 60 but we will have had lots of good grub.She was lovely,gorgeous eyes,brown almost black,and perfect eye liner.Gorgeous eyes.
Fag time.
I told him Im off out for a fag and back in a bit.It was lovely,I always loved going from a brightly lit crowded room,with all the noise,out into the cold and dark,and all the noise sounds distant.Always loved being on the outside looking in.I lit up,arrhhh thats better.
Some old fella came out and lit up too,we chatted.He was ever so nice,freindly chatty.It was about now I remembered I was a boy in a dress.I had forgot!Honestly.Everyone just assumed I was a girl,it didnt help that I had told everyone we were married for a giggle,well I did have the dress! Ofcourse I revert to type....after I had put my fag out in the special bin for such things (posh or what) I lifted my dress up off the floor and went back in,ofcourse giving him a good view of my stocking top and bare thigh through the split in my dress.He had a good eye full,seemed to make his night anyway.I know I know,but I just love to make people happy,or smile or laugh.At least I kept the dress on,thats something.
I loved being talked to and viewed as a proper girl.well woman now I suppose.Some old couple we were talking to,asked us to dance.I said I dont dance not in these shoes,but it was a slow one so ok.So I had my first slow dance with some posh old fella.I couldnt help but smile,yet he didnt try and cop a feel,didnt grope me,or try it on,or grab my hair and drag me off somewhere.That was new.I could get used to this.
I did dance with a couple of blokes,all the time Im thinking how can they not know Im not a boy,are they blind or what.But nope.I really could get used to this.
It was nice being popular,being asked to dance by a few folks,and chatting with the other ladies between dances,loved it.
Trust M to ruin the mood a tad,"you know why they are all asking you to dance dont you?" "errr no" he sighed "...is it becouse of my tiara?Did I mention I have a tiara on?" again hes sighing,"no its becouse you flash your stocking tops evertytime you turn".
Ooops.Oh well.Least my cock hadnt fell out!So you know,small mercies and all that.See couldve been worse.
Me and him danced a few times too,I was loving it,ofcourse I was playing up the married thing,like when we were dancing I would be whispering in his ear "does this mean I have to nag you now?does this mean we cant have sex anymore?Does this mean I get to tell you off for chucking your clothes on the floor as its a floor not a shelf!Oh did I mention my tiara?"hehehehe.
It was just a perfect night.One of the happiest of my life.Just giddy.
Funny,not a few years before I was homeless,living rough,starving,yet here I was at the Bakewell midsummer ball in a tiara.Did I mention ?Funny how quickly life can change isnt it,just worlds apart.
Finally it had to end,like everything in this world,everything has an ending,which sucks by the way.We said good night to a few couples as everyone starting heading off,and we slowly headed towards the carpark to wait for the taxi which would be a while.
I put my arms around his neck and thanked him for a wonderful night out,it was perfect.I cant feel my cock its been tucked that long,I think its dead,died of malnutrition I think,it might need the kiss of life I joked wickedly,he just rolled his eyes and I get the usual "you get worse" answer.I smiled and kissed him,pulled back,stared into his eyes,mine are very pale blue where his were very dark brown,and being of greek decent had that tint to his skin and long black curly hair,so girly,so girly looking.......I snogged him softly,passionatly my hands in his hair,his in mine......nope it doesnt take much to get my engine going.I reached down,hes hard already,so I slowly walk him back into the dark bit of the car park all the while still snogging him,and I get it out and go down on him there and then.I dont think anyone could see,didnt even care at this point and anyway his back was towards the road so Im well hidden.I sucked him off for a while,then pulled my knickers to one side,relief as it fell out,thats nice,cold,but nice freeing my poor little cock from its tucked prison.I do love the feeling of fresh cold air on it.
Anyway I stood up and smiled at him,that knowing smile which means Im ready for some,as honestly,I dont really talk at all.He knew what it meant,as I turned slowly round and put both my hands slowly up against the stone wall and spread my legs.He was fumbling with my dress.Sigh.I mean how hard is it to lift it up.I dont know.
I help him lift it up,hes too low so I spread my legs wider lowering my hole for him,I feel it on my bum cheeks,so I reach round and guide it towards my boy pussy.There we go,its in.I gasp.Dont know why,just did.So he starts slowly and builds up speed as I just realise we are straight accross from the police station!But Im being shagged so stuff it dont care.
I know,Ive had a few girlfriends like this,as soon as the screwing starts you just get carried away and dont care where you are or whos watching.Thats how turned on you can get.
That was one of my fave postions too,up against a wall spread eagled like being searched by the coppers,but being shagged,really hard!That wasnt like him,but he was really going for it this time,didnt think he had it in him,oh yeah.I arch my back as much as possible and lean back into him,one hand around his neck so I have my hand in his long curly hair the other down on my cock as he pounds me hard.Oh Im loving this!
It was almost a hate shag,you know where they try to hurt you with their cock,what I call 'angry cock'.
Well Im like a rag doll loving this,and I come,hard.I buck backwards really hard like I do when I come,making his cock go in all the more harder,which makes me come harder,then he came aswell.Oh yes.I love coming at the same time,why is it just so much more.Just is.
That was one hell of a nice shag.We are both panting,my hands have dropped to my sides,total rag doll now,he couldve done anything to me at that point,anything at all.He wispered "I lov..." and jumped.Something or someone mustve spooked him as he jumped his cock fell out of me,and I didnt have time to put my hand over my hole to stop his babies all leaking out of me and down my legs.Oh well good job I have stockings on,theyre great for such emergancies,as they can soak up tons of goo,and it doenst show up either.Excellent.
I adjust my knickers,tuck my cock away and rearrange my dress and try to flatten my hair back down and put my tiara back in place.Did I mention?
Am I driving you mad with that yet?Thats nothing,for weeks after this I would wear it whenever we met in his car.Drove him nuts.
Anyway,we snuggled together as it was getting cold now,the taxi finally arrived and Im so glad I gave myself a treat otherwise I wouldve done something stupid in the taxi knowing me.
We kissed goodbye and the taxi took me home.I was on cloud nine.How different my life had gone.Perfect night.Perfect place.I got some.Had some giggles.Loved my dress.And for once,I felt special.Id never felt that before,that was new.I liked that feeling.Plus,I think he was going to say "I love you" till he got spooked.I didnt know what to make of that.I know I liked him a lot,loved how girly he was,loved adored his big girl boobs,loved how girly he looked,not manly even a little,just another girly boy like me,and yes I do think Im getting feelings for him.Crap.
Is that good or bad?
More confusion thanks.
But who cares,that was a perfect night,loved it all so much.If only every day could be like that.
I never pushed it,I never pushed the 'l' word as thats not right.It was up to him to say it or not.He never did though,sometimes he looked like he was but never did.
We still met in his car,we still did it often,usually me doing all the hard work,and seeing to myself.Oh well cant have everything.
We had lots of laughs,and just got on so well.Equals which I love.Ok I drove him mad with my insistance on wearing my tiara all the time "will you take that thing off!" he'd cry,Id be all "errrr nope" "its been two weeks,take it off!",Id be all "errr did you just dare tell me what to do?!?" then Id launch a full on tickling attack.He was very ticklish,so am I for that matter.But for daring to tell me what to do,this was a 'no mercy' attack,which meant no matter how much he pleaded for mercy and begged me to stop,no way.Not till he was helpless with laughter,tears running down his chubby cheeks,only then would I relent.
Then he would get his own back and tickle me till I was helpless,unless I switched it off as weirdly I can switch it on and off,tickle me all you want if Ive switched it off Im not ticklish,but I can switch it back on.Used to drive him mad with that ability.I am a bit weird when you think about it.
We went out for months,not quite a year I think,but like everything,it ends.
His rattling on about us running away together,his rufusal to say the L word when I could tell with his eyes thats what he felt,and the way he touched me told me it was so,and I was falling in love with him I think.
Im not fond of feelings,they always confuse me and I never know what Im feeling,I rely on others to tell me how I feel usually.
But his endless talk of running away,me having to see to myself,his low sex drive and no kinkyness,and refusal to be seen out with me was slowly taking its toll looking back in hindsight.I would say I have qualifications coming out my arse,I can work anywhere in the world,I have one hell of a reputation already as that was everything in my line of work,I can cook clean iron sew darn knit,everything.Theres nothing here for me,and not much for you so why dont we just go then.Why not.
He would always make out its just dreaming.But why not,nothing to stop us we can do anything if we want.But no it was just talk sadly.
I think if he had meant it,I wouldve gone with him and made a life for us together.Whether it wouldve worked long term I doubt it though.Shame really as I did care for him deeply.I just wish I could tell him,but all I could do was stare into his eyes and tell him with my eyes as I dont have the words.I tell him with the way I touch him.That says more than words can.
But we eventually went our seperate ways as I cant be a dirty little secret as I have nothing to be ashamed about,and I would like to think I am more than just a good shag.Surely.
We parted friendly though,that was good as I did think a lot about him and that was that.
My first boyfriend.
Still makes me sad to think about it.I think I couldve made him happy,well I did.Could always make him laugh,make him hard,make him cum....and cum again,make him feel good about himself,everything.Oh well if ifs and buts were pots and pans and all that.
I did find out from his sister years later when we bumped into each other in town and started rattling and catching up,all the while Im fancying her like mad,it turned out he told his sister everything.Not like me and my sister then!
Yikes.Im sat here and she knows....everything?!Yikes I need to run,run far.
But yes,everything.So much for being a secret then.Yep she knew all about us doing it,she already knew about me being in girl mode boy mode,knew about me kissing the older boys at school (did everyone know?!),knew about the perfect night out at the midsummer ball,the job lot.
Aparently it turned out he was in love with me,I did suspect as eyes dont lie.I must admit I think I loved him too,if Im honest,yep.Hate to admit it but yeah I think so.
And that was the problem,he couldnt get past the fact Im a girl with a cock and it freaked him out as he didnt want to be gay,even though no he wasnt as I dont look like a man,never been mistook for one thats for sure.But he had this hang up about it and that was that.Such a shame.
Aparantly he wanted to do more stuff with me but it was that hang up he had about thinking he must be gay that stopped him,and also why he wouldnt crossdress either as he did like the idea and had pinched his sisters clothes before when little.Just like the rest of us then.
His sister had told him too that he wasnt gay,but he wouldnt listen to her either.I dont know.But it did screw him up,he didnt like that feeling or thought.You know,its like,how can I put it.....you know how your girlfriend holds your boy pussy open as her friend pours hot wax in you,its not nice is it later when youre trying to scoop out all the dried wax....its like that,drives you nuts trying to get it out,or if its dripped on your tongue how yucky it tastes,its a bit like that,or when how when youre little and youre on the swings playing and some chuffs grab you by the hair and finger bang you?
I think its a bit like that.I know Im not good at explaining things,sorry.
But I hope you can see what I mean,its like you are stuck,cant get out of something,cant get out of the situation,like that,its a bit of an obscacle?Sort of thing.Sorry really not good at explaining.
I did feel so sorry for him for not being able to let go and be with someone he wanted to be with,plus his parents wouldve killed him if they had known what he was up to with me.They really wouldve.
I told her to pass on my love and kisses to him,and hoped he would find someone as he was lovely and deserved to be happy.Im sorry it couldnt have been me but I cant change how I was born and wouldnt want to anyway,as I love being able to jump from one world to the other and back again at will.Its ace.
She kissed me on the cheek and squeezed my hand,smiled and we chatted a while longer.

And that was it.
My first boyfriend or girly boyfriend as I think of it.
Oh well.Such a shame.Still I hope he does find every happyness one day,he deserves that much,and we had tons of giggles and adventures,and I did love being the bouncy girl a few times a week,and we will always have the midsummer ball.
Did I mention I had a tiara?

Anyway next up Im in my twenties hurtling up to thirty,yikes,and afer me and M broke up yes you guessed it,I blamed it all on crossdressing,and yes threw everything out as I wasnt doing that ever again,done with it,I mean it this time......even Im boring myself now lol.
So next up.......a few girlfriends later,two very strange incidents where I do something stupid as Im horny as hell,oh dear,and I finally find someone daft enough to marry me.That will be the last part of this saga I think then.So look forward to part four,where not a lot happens,except I start to look a bit more manlier,I must be getting some testosterone at last or something,but everyone still thinks Im a girl.Oh well.
So look forward to that snooze fest.
Me in my 30s-