Background
I just wanted to share some background info about myself for anyone who would like to know more. My first unusual experience with another male was as a c***d, a neighbor and I used to go behind the furnace in my parents basement and pee on each others hands. Other than that I had pretty normal c***dhood but in my teens I sucked my first dick and loved it. It was the 70's and I was scared to death he would tell someone and my life would be ruined but he said he would be considered a queer or a faggot too so we kept it to ourselves. Although it was always me sucking him it grew into a secret relationship, we made out, and eventually I tried to receive him anally but it hurt like hell because we didnt know what we were doing.
That was the my only male on male experience but as I got older I began to go to local parks and jack off in the bathroom or in the car hoping to meet someone but I was so timid and afraid of getting caught by someone who knew me. I dated girls until I got married and had k**s but could never forget how it felt to have a mans dick in my mouth.
About the time I turned 45 and was no longer having sex with my wife my curiosity got the best of me and I began meeting with other men. Sometimes just for jo, playing with each other or trading head, but it didn't take long to realize I just wanted to suck dick. I looked for men wanting a no reciprocation cocksucker but they were harder to find than I thought so when I found them I tried to make them regulars and have had quite a few regulars over the years.
I began to realize some men liked specific or unusual things, one liked me to put both of his balls in my mouth and pull hard, one liked me to finger his butt as I sucked, but one wanted me to lick his butt and wow I immediately loved doing that too. I started to run Craigslist ads and ate as many as 4 mens asses a day as they jacked off. I'm sure many of you would consider eating a mans ass disgusting and nasty but for me it was addicting. I love the smell, and the taste but most of all I love doing it because it is dirty, nasty and disgusting. At first I just ate their asses but eventually found myself wanting their cum and sometimes licked off the floor after they left, that's when I began to realize I was not just a fag, but a nasty, raunchy fag.
The last few years I have slowed down and only been with 3 men. One was a regular who just stopped calling, another had a smaller cock but he was so hairy and masculine, he never called he just showed up expecting me to suck him dick and of course I did. I loved that called me a faggot and a queer, he would say things like "you like this faggot" as he tried to gag me with his dick. He really made me feel like a cocksucker and a fag, but in a moment of weakness I told him I cant do it anymore and I guess I was a bit surprised when he turned and walked out without saying a word. I ran to the door to tell him I didn't mean it as he pulled away.
The third was actually before the last two I mentioned but about a year ago we starting emailing again. I had only sucked his dick a few times, but after throwing him a few hints he "made me" drink his pee and lick his butt. A few years ago we made arrangements for him to fuck me at his home but he cancelled that morning and I was so disappointed. He has the biggest cock I had ever sucked, but that long ago to I was able to take a large Doc Johnson butt plug so I really wanted him in me. When we started emailing again I kept suggesting things but they never seemed to happen and now were are dealing with different kind of keeping safe. I think he knows how bad I want him, and my desire to do anything that makes me feel like a nasty fag but I'm done looking for a new man.
I apologize to anyone offended by the word fag or faggot, but I feel its the only word that fits who I am. I cant believe some of the things I've done, fantasized about, or would do if told to without hesitation, things most people would consider downright disgusting. Of course i have limits, but I love doing the nasty raunchy stuff their girfriends or wifes wont do, I love being the guy a man and come to get off and use, and I love the challenge of being able to take what ever a man can dish out.
That was the my only male on male experience but as I got older I began to go to local parks and jack off in the bathroom or in the car hoping to meet someone but I was so timid and afraid of getting caught by someone who knew me. I dated girls until I got married and had k**s but could never forget how it felt to have a mans dick in my mouth.
About the time I turned 45 and was no longer having sex with my wife my curiosity got the best of me and I began meeting with other men. Sometimes just for jo, playing with each other or trading head, but it didn't take long to realize I just wanted to suck dick. I looked for men wanting a no reciprocation cocksucker but they were harder to find than I thought so when I found them I tried to make them regulars and have had quite a few regulars over the years.
I began to realize some men liked specific or unusual things, one liked me to put both of his balls in my mouth and pull hard, one liked me to finger his butt as I sucked, but one wanted me to lick his butt and wow I immediately loved doing that too. I started to run Craigslist ads and ate as many as 4 mens asses a day as they jacked off. I'm sure many of you would consider eating a mans ass disgusting and nasty but for me it was addicting. I love the smell, and the taste but most of all I love doing it because it is dirty, nasty and disgusting. At first I just ate their asses but eventually found myself wanting their cum and sometimes licked off the floor after they left, that's when I began to realize I was not just a fag, but a nasty, raunchy fag.
The last few years I have slowed down and only been with 3 men. One was a regular who just stopped calling, another had a smaller cock but he was so hairy and masculine, he never called he just showed up expecting me to suck him dick and of course I did. I loved that called me a faggot and a queer, he would say things like "you like this faggot" as he tried to gag me with his dick. He really made me feel like a cocksucker and a fag, but in a moment of weakness I told him I cant do it anymore and I guess I was a bit surprised when he turned and walked out without saying a word. I ran to the door to tell him I didn't mean it as he pulled away.
The third was actually before the last two I mentioned but about a year ago we starting emailing again. I had only sucked his dick a few times, but after throwing him a few hints he "made me" drink his pee and lick his butt. A few years ago we made arrangements for him to fuck me at his home but he cancelled that morning and I was so disappointed. He has the biggest cock I had ever sucked, but that long ago to I was able to take a large Doc Johnson butt plug so I really wanted him in me. When we started emailing again I kept suggesting things but they never seemed to happen and now were are dealing with different kind of keeping safe. I think he knows how bad I want him, and my desire to do anything that makes me feel like a nasty fag but I'm done looking for a new man.
I apologize to anyone offended by the word fag or faggot, but I feel its the only word that fits who I am. I cant believe some of the things I've done, fantasized about, or would do if told to without hesitation, things most people would consider downright disgusting. Of course i have limits, but I love doing the nasty raunchy stuff their girfriends or wifes wont do, I love being the guy a man and come to get off and use, and I love the challenge of being able to take what ever a man can dish out.
3 years ago