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jordanlskalland
Grand Rapids, United States
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jordanlskalland
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About

Hi Girls! ...I gotta be honest with you...Im a reasonably normal individual. So I'd really like to meet a girl who isnt afraid to let it get real weird. ...I dont actually watch a lot of porn, however, I am here because Im interested in meeting a few, umm...fun individuals. Im tall. Im fit. Im handsome. Blah blah blah...I love my mom...And jesus...and my cat...I pay taxes. I work 5 days a week....blahzey scoot and woo woo woo. Here is the real deal: Im good looking, so you better be too. If you fake, then dont message me. If you a gold-digger & only tryin to take my money... I aint got no tips for ya hoe. But if you just wanna talk, laugh, share a bit of dirty fun, AND if you got a decent rack, ya know, the kind that makes straight men wanna volunteer to help raise awareness for breast cancer research, and makes gay men wanna design you a new frilly off the shoulder number thats supported only by the curve of your Ta-Ta's and the power of prayer...Hit me up! By all means, Princess.

Name:
Captain Strongjaw
Gender:
Male
Last Login:
3 years ago
Relationship Status:
"Single"
Interested In:
Girls
City:
Grand Rapids
Country:
"United States"
Occupation:
Marketing and Sales
Interests and Hobbies:
Gym Time, NFL Football, Spending time with my Cat, Reading Astronomy Magazines and books, and a Decent set of tits.
Favorite Movies and TV Shows:
Forrest Gump, Anything with Will farrell. Step Brothers, Anchorman, Thor, The Avengers, LOTR, A Beautiful Mind.
Favorite Music:
Classic Rock n Roll
Favorite Books:
Anything written by Neil DeGrasse Tyson
Turn Ons:
A sharp sense of humor. Full Lips with lipstick. Slow & Soft Kisses. Big tits. Intelligence. A big Vocabulary. Loyalty. Too much eye-liner. Too little shame. Too many rings on fingers. Any rings on her toes. Offering to split the dinner bill. Going to bed together as a couple. Slow Grinding Foreplay. Anyone who understands that Id much rather listen than talk.
Turn Offs:
Bad breath. Body Hair. Too much drama. Japanese Sushi, Shell fish, midwestern accents, Texting me pics of your pussy when I never asked to see it. Talking on the phone for more than 10 mins. Girls who cant survive without their cell phone. Checking your phone ore than twice on our date. Country Music. Rap music. Any music that requires the listener to smoke a joint in order to understand the songs meaning. Gossipy Bitches. Reality TV. Any mention of Kim Kardashian in a celebratory manner. Kaitlyn Jenner. Kanye West. my grandmas neck beard. And sloppy basic bitches.
Profile Views:
15
Videos Watched:
17
Achievements (11)View All
Friends (9)View All
Subscribers (4)View All
Subscriptions (15)View All
Channel Subscriptions (41)View All
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