Hotwife Guilt
One of the many challenges for couples when adopting a cuckolding lifestyle is learning to manage various emotions which are intensified substantially by lifestyle experiences. Today’s topic is the burden of guilt needlessly carried by many wives - even those who are already well experienced in cuckolding their husband.
Wives new to cuckolding would want to hide such a sight from their cuckold. Letting their husband witness the contented expression and the intimacy with which you cling to your lover will certainly cause very intense emotions for him, but they provide confirmation that his gift of sacrifice as your cuckold is well worth the effort.
Wives new to cuckolding would want to hide such a sight from their cuckold. Letting their husband witness the contented expression and the intimacy with which you cling to your lover will certainly cause very intense emotions for him, but they provide confirmation that his gift of sacrifice as your cuckold is well worth the effort.
Two-way Street
First wives must realize they’re not alone - either as wives experiencing this or as a spouse. Your husband can also experience extreme guilt for many of the same reasons; let this be common ground you share with each other rather than a reason to exclude each other emotionally.
Common Sources
Each wife will experience guilt from a variety of sources and which of those is greater will vary for each woman depending on her situation, but common sources of guilt are:
religious conflicts
motherhood conflicts
the taboo effect
Religious Conflicts
This topic deserves its own article, but I’ll touch on some basics here. Many couples I’ve known or spoken to felt very conflicted about their desires for cuckolding vs their belief that it violates their religious beliefs. My challenge to that is two-fold. First, show me an evangelical who doesn’t already selectively adhere to the tenets of their faith and I’ll show you Jesus. Do you ‘obey’ your husband? Do you practice any form of birth control? Most likely no to the former and yes to the latter. These choices are simply more relevant in our times and in our culture, right? Much the same can be said of cuckolding. Follow the spirit of the law with regard to fidelity and your needs can coexist with your religion just fine. By this, I mean that the intent of a fidelity clause in marriage vows is all about context. When this journey is one that you take together, there is no violation of the vows of fidelity.
Motherhood Conflicts
Most wives and mothers worry more about the welfare of their c***dren with regard to enjoying a lifestyle where they are free to date than they worry about the religious implications. While this is understandable, it’s also overreacting. The bottom line is that k**s feel far more threatened by secrets and the appearance of a troubled marriage than they are by the exercise of choice and the expression of love that cuckolding is.
The default position is to assume that the right thing to do is lie, lie, lie. “Mom is working late tonight” you tell them. Then one lie begets another to cover the first one. This is obviously not the best path for a family.
Is it not also your responsibility as parents to teach them what a loving, caring relationship is like?
Is there not benefit in them seeing for themselves that a trusting, loving marriage has options not available to others who don’t make the same effort?
I’ve seen first-hand the emotional toll it can take on a c***d when they fear their parents might divorce when they see signs of deception and unexplained behaviors the parents don’t even realize they communicate. As with other aspects of parenting, present a united front and be honest with your k**s. This isn’t to say you need to be open to the point of being explicit, it simply means treating this as a natural part of life, not something you feel ashamed of.
I’ve written about my first experience with a family in this way here (opens in new tab/window). I suggest couples with c***dren still at home read this as something to ponder as you talk about your lifestyle needs.
Taboo Effect
This is one of the shared guilts between both husband and wife and can be summed as being guilt-ridden about enjoying something that goes against everything you were raised to believe and do. This ‘violation’ of those norms is what makes it taboo and what makes it so intense. The reality is that the reason you desire this, the reason it seems, at times, to be so right for you, despite how you were raised, is that how you were raised is in complete opposition to how we are wired as humans. Women were always intended to be very sexual creatures - this is why they were given much more sexual capacity than males - we’ve simply repressed that for a couple thousand years.
servicing her stud
As with most wives, this one was likely very self-conscious of how eagerly she responds to her lover’s wishes and was likely very reluctant to let her husband find out how submissive she feels when she’s with him. This emotion is easily understood by her husband because he feels that same sense of submissive anxiety from being painfully erect whenever he thinks of her relationship with him.
The other side to the Taboo Effect is being ashamed of yourself for finding yourself so aroused by the involvement of your spouse. For the husbands, this guilt surfaces early on as they try to come to grips with the reality that the idea of you surrendering yourself sexually to another man is truly exciting for him - the opposite of how they were brought up to react to a ‘competing’ male. For wives it’s not only the guilt of realizing that having a lover is appealing and erotic, but also realizing that the potential for humbling the husband can also have erotic elements. This is often a larger component than the guilt associated their own enjoyment of such an experience - and is a complete waste of your energy. Your husband, as your cuckold, not only expects this humbling experience, but welcomes it as a means of expressing a sexually submissive role. It’s a challenge to accept this at face value for a new couple, but it’s true.
Working Through It
The first and foremost key to working through this guilt is managing it so it doesn’t manage you. You achieve this by accepting these feelings for what they are and understanding that though they are natural, they aren’t useful or productive. Your husband wants you to experience these pleasures both despite and because of the emotional conflicts they create. The simple fact that you have these reservations and fears is demonstration of your emotional commitment to your marriage and is an excellent indicator of your suitability for cuckolding as a couple.
Delight In The Detail
aye aye, captainDon’t let your guilt prevent you from sharing in this erotic experience with you husband. As your cuckold, your husband absolutely needs to feel included. Feeling part of it is the main ingredient in what allows him to feel aroused by this more than he feels threatened by it. It’s important to understand that your cuckold doesn’t have to be there to see you ride your lover’s cock to feel included; cuddling with him and providing explicit details is both rewarding and healthy intimacy for you two to share, but it does require that you move beyond your feelings of guilt and self-consciousness as your husband had to do to simply share this idea with you to begin with.
Because of guilt and perhaps a lack of experience communicating erotic situations, most wives are very reluctant to speak of their experiences outside the marriage in much detail with their husband. The wife’s instinct to protect her husband’s feelings, though understandable, is incorrect.
Yes, you will feel guilty telling your husband that your lover has a longer, thicker cock and can reach quite a bit deeper inside you than he can, but, as you’ll see, your husband will always respond verrrry positively to such details - it’s not knowing that leads to deeper problems such as doubt and insecurity. It’s ok that you enjoy seeing him squirm a bit when you admit that you swallowed for your boyfriend knowing that such a pleasure isn’t something you provide for your husband - this is expected behavior in cuckolding.
Bottom Line
The excitement, the humiliation, the guilt are all emotions you will both share in as a cuckold couple - share in them together and they are separate bonds of commonality that strengthen your marriage through cuckolding.
Wives new to cuckolding would want to hide such a sight from their cuckold. Letting their husband witness the contented expression and the intimacy with which you cling to your lover will certainly cause very intense emotions for him, but they provide confirmation that his gift of sacrifice as your cuckold is well worth the effort.
Wives new to cuckolding would want to hide such a sight from their cuckold. Letting their husband witness the contented expression and the intimacy with which you cling to your lover will certainly cause very intense emotions for him, but they provide confirmation that his gift of sacrifice as your cuckold is well worth the effort.
Two-way Street
First wives must realize they’re not alone - either as wives experiencing this or as a spouse. Your husband can also experience extreme guilt for many of the same reasons; let this be common ground you share with each other rather than a reason to exclude each other emotionally.
Common Sources
Each wife will experience guilt from a variety of sources and which of those is greater will vary for each woman depending on her situation, but common sources of guilt are:
religious conflicts
motherhood conflicts
the taboo effect
Religious Conflicts
This topic deserves its own article, but I’ll touch on some basics here. Many couples I’ve known or spoken to felt very conflicted about their desires for cuckolding vs their belief that it violates their religious beliefs. My challenge to that is two-fold. First, show me an evangelical who doesn’t already selectively adhere to the tenets of their faith and I’ll show you Jesus. Do you ‘obey’ your husband? Do you practice any form of birth control? Most likely no to the former and yes to the latter. These choices are simply more relevant in our times and in our culture, right? Much the same can be said of cuckolding. Follow the spirit of the law with regard to fidelity and your needs can coexist with your religion just fine. By this, I mean that the intent of a fidelity clause in marriage vows is all about context. When this journey is one that you take together, there is no violation of the vows of fidelity.
Motherhood Conflicts
Most wives and mothers worry more about the welfare of their c***dren with regard to enjoying a lifestyle where they are free to date than they worry about the religious implications. While this is understandable, it’s also overreacting. The bottom line is that k**s feel far more threatened by secrets and the appearance of a troubled marriage than they are by the exercise of choice and the expression of love that cuckolding is.
The default position is to assume that the right thing to do is lie, lie, lie. “Mom is working late tonight” you tell them. Then one lie begets another to cover the first one. This is obviously not the best path for a family.
Is it not also your responsibility as parents to teach them what a loving, caring relationship is like?
Is there not benefit in them seeing for themselves that a trusting, loving marriage has options not available to others who don’t make the same effort?
I’ve seen first-hand the emotional toll it can take on a c***d when they fear their parents might divorce when they see signs of deception and unexplained behaviors the parents don’t even realize they communicate. As with other aspects of parenting, present a united front and be honest with your k**s. This isn’t to say you need to be open to the point of being explicit, it simply means treating this as a natural part of life, not something you feel ashamed of.
I’ve written about my first experience with a family in this way here (opens in new tab/window). I suggest couples with c***dren still at home read this as something to ponder as you talk about your lifestyle needs.
Taboo Effect
This is one of the shared guilts between both husband and wife and can be summed as being guilt-ridden about enjoying something that goes against everything you were raised to believe and do. This ‘violation’ of those norms is what makes it taboo and what makes it so intense. The reality is that the reason you desire this, the reason it seems, at times, to be so right for you, despite how you were raised, is that how you were raised is in complete opposition to how we are wired as humans. Women were always intended to be very sexual creatures - this is why they were given much more sexual capacity than males - we’ve simply repressed that for a couple thousand years.
servicing her stud
As with most wives, this one was likely very self-conscious of how eagerly she responds to her lover’s wishes and was likely very reluctant to let her husband find out how submissive she feels when she’s with him. This emotion is easily understood by her husband because he feels that same sense of submissive anxiety from being painfully erect whenever he thinks of her relationship with him.
The other side to the Taboo Effect is being ashamed of yourself for finding yourself so aroused by the involvement of your spouse. For the husbands, this guilt surfaces early on as they try to come to grips with the reality that the idea of you surrendering yourself sexually to another man is truly exciting for him - the opposite of how they were brought up to react to a ‘competing’ male. For wives it’s not only the guilt of realizing that having a lover is appealing and erotic, but also realizing that the potential for humbling the husband can also have erotic elements. This is often a larger component than the guilt associated their own enjoyment of such an experience - and is a complete waste of your energy. Your husband, as your cuckold, not only expects this humbling experience, but welcomes it as a means of expressing a sexually submissive role. It’s a challenge to accept this at face value for a new couple, but it’s true.
Working Through It
The first and foremost key to working through this guilt is managing it so it doesn’t manage you. You achieve this by accepting these feelings for what they are and understanding that though they are natural, they aren’t useful or productive. Your husband wants you to experience these pleasures both despite and because of the emotional conflicts they create. The simple fact that you have these reservations and fears is demonstration of your emotional commitment to your marriage and is an excellent indicator of your suitability for cuckolding as a couple.
Delight In The Detail
aye aye, captainDon’t let your guilt prevent you from sharing in this erotic experience with you husband. As your cuckold, your husband absolutely needs to feel included. Feeling part of it is the main ingredient in what allows him to feel aroused by this more than he feels threatened by it. It’s important to understand that your cuckold doesn’t have to be there to see you ride your lover’s cock to feel included; cuddling with him and providing explicit details is both rewarding and healthy intimacy for you two to share, but it does require that you move beyond your feelings of guilt and self-consciousness as your husband had to do to simply share this idea with you to begin with.
Because of guilt and perhaps a lack of experience communicating erotic situations, most wives are very reluctant to speak of their experiences outside the marriage in much detail with their husband. The wife’s instinct to protect her husband’s feelings, though understandable, is incorrect.
Yes, you will feel guilty telling your husband that your lover has a longer, thicker cock and can reach quite a bit deeper inside you than he can, but, as you’ll see, your husband will always respond verrrry positively to such details - it’s not knowing that leads to deeper problems such as doubt and insecurity. It’s ok that you enjoy seeing him squirm a bit when you admit that you swallowed for your boyfriend knowing that such a pleasure isn’t something you provide for your husband - this is expected behavior in cuckolding.
Bottom Line
The excitement, the humiliation, the guilt are all emotions you will both share in as a cuckold couple - share in them together and they are separate bonds of commonality that strengthen your marriage through cuckolding.
10 years ago