You Can't Always Be #1 -or- True Reasons Why

(This writing is meant for entertainment purposes only for the sake of dark humor. Taking this seriously will only further prove the point of the subject matter discussed throughout this piece so please unclench your sphincter and enjoy.)

Finding out the news that a certain lesbian duo left the xhamster camsite they once claimed as their own gave me a good laugh for a bit and knowing that the universe has eventual follow through with those who need to learn how to grow up and play fair. You can’t always be number one and when they saw how they measured up falling to a new low of second place they officially called it quits saying their departure was based on every reason beside their new spot at the finish line.

Never in my life have I met individuals so hellbent on superiority and when those efforts fail becoming more than sore losers. Such sore losers that when their 11 month long winning streak came to an end they didn’t chalk it up to the possibility someone else could take the spotlight but rather if they can’t be first, they won’t be anything at all. Instead they pack their things and leave for the next site they will attempt to reign until it's eventual demise. Lather, rinse, repeat. In the process however they’ve acquired enough followers to adoringly trail along to whatever affiliate link they may leave in their wake.

If their reasons for quitting really were the ones they used as their excuse for departure they would have left months ago when those issues were more than persistant. I used the xhamster live cams for a brief period and after seeing how unprofessional it was I no longer relied on it for even a tertiary possibility. I may use the site to get the minimum payout as it is efficient for self promotion of pretty much anything you see fit. And without even having proper moderators you could advertise an entirely different cam site on their server and not even penalized. Despite these issues the dynamic duo stayed put because as long as they took 1st every month on the most viewed cam $2,000 was a guarantee on top of all the other hourly winnings and tips they received for a total of about twice their bonus earnings. For this amount I can’t blame them for staying as long as they did but I still can’t get over the elementary mindset of throwing in the towel because of pride.

All good things do come to an end whether luck runs out or, just simply put, you naturally expire. Their reign of xhamster popularity became peppered with “drama” that seemed to be exclusively associated with the sapphic couple themselves. While they made claims they were sick of said drama it seemed they were the only ones it actually affected. Many other amateur cammers had no continual issues with each other, only the technical issues that xhamster’s live cams knowingly have. I would often grow irritated with the blatant rule breaking that was just stupidly obvious to begin with.

In my years as a cam model I’ve never even been concerned with the activities of other models until I became a part of this site and only then it was because of the fantastical trainwreck it was. I’ve only affiliated myself with sites where professionalism had significant importance and if a performer behaved similarly to Veruca Salt she was immediately canned. Since “Veruca” & co. became the reality show of cam modeling they actually got Jersey Shore-like ratings from an audience who would seriously watch such a travesty.

When I heard they left I knew it had to be for a sudden reason and not one that was actually thought out over time and then eventually executed. Seeing their iconic smushed together derrieres on the second row, such a strange and unfamiliar site, it only made sense to pin this as the reason for their resignation as this was truly the only change with actual evidence.

Of course if I am writing about such it’s only fair to allow the reader to assume my attention of the subject is because I’m jealous**. To continue with the thought pattern perpetuated for nearly a year, any one person that points out an unsavory example of the proud pair is “just starting high school drama”. Since I never attended regular high school maybe this is my effort to try and understand the mentality they had but I’ve continued to fail time and time again. In the end what I’ve learned about those who happen to mention high school being a place with a continually favored though process are possibly the ones who have the hardest time being able to leave the sophomoric thinking behind.

With all this said, and for sake of satire alone, I bid adieu to the heavenly hedonists known as the DeLuca's; The first true cam model monopoly of a porn site named after a rodent.

**If you actually believed that, you are part of the problem.