Wanting Sex With My Dad

Having sex with my Dad was my very first sexual fantasy and it will always be one of my biggest fantasies. And nobody can take that fantasy away from me – even a guy on xHamster the other day who called me a “weirdo” for having it.

This fantasy started developing when I was 10 or 11 or 12 years old. I can't remember exactly when. One morning before Dad went to work I went into his bedroom and he was totally naked and doing jumping jacks. His penis was bouncing up and down and that's the first time I ever saw a penis and it burned an image in my mind that I can still see clearly today.

After that morning I went into his bedroom lots of times in the morning for about maybe 3 years until Mom said it wasn't “appropriate”. I, myself, was naked in his bedroom except for my socks. I remember so many times when bubbles would be coming out of my vagina and wet my parents' bed as I watched my Dad do his morning jumping jacks.

Where my fantasy really started turning sexual is when I was around 12 and discovered my Dad's pornography collection of video cassettes. I had learned about the “birds and bees” in my sex-education class but when I played the cassettes that was the first time that I saw actual sexual intercourse and other things.

So many times alone at home I watched those pornography cassettes because I was so curious to know more about sex. But they left me with more questions than answers. Like, why was a woman putting a man's penis in her mouth when it should go inside her vagina? And why were the men always making their semen go onto women's faces instead of in their vaginas when the whole reason for sex was to make a baby? And how come in Dad's drawer with the cassettes was a dildo shaped like a penis that was attached to a belt when he already had a penis? (I learned much later by 2+2 that the dildo belonged to my Mom and she was using it on Dad.)

So, looking at my Dad's penis every morning and viewing pornography each day fueled in me this incredible desire to lose my virginity to my Dad. He was the only man or boy who I really knew except for my creepy Uncle Jack and my Dad was (and is) so kind to me. But I did know by then that it was “wrong” so all I did was masturbate night after night about seducing my Dad and getting him to fuck me.

And there were a few times in my early teens when Mom was away visiting her parents that I almost – ALMOST – acted on my fantasy. I went so far as to walk naked down the hallway at night and right to My Dad's closed bedroom door. I wanted to open that door and climb on his naked body and make his penis hard with my mouth and then put it inside my virgin vagina before he even woke up. But I chickened out because I didn't know what his reaction would be.

A few years later when I was 16 I finally did get my virginity taken care of by a 20 year old guy. But I'm sure my first time would have been better with my dad. Still, deep down I am relieved that I didn't act on my fantasy with him because it would have changed our relationship forever and probably not in the best way.

Yet, to this day – even as a 28 year old woman – I still masturbate regularly about getting my Dad to fuck me. He's a good looking man in his early 50s and I'd bend over in a second for him to use me and it seems that he would like my strap-on too. But that won't happen. It's all fantasy but nobody calling me a “weirdo” is going to take that fantasy away from me.