The curse of being good in bed
Imagine being on a date with someone who seems interesting and sexy, with no expectations on how evening will end. You laugh and drink, maybe it's your place, maybe it's his. He is nice, polite even, tries to be charming, however... There is a certain distance between you two, you can feel you are not exactly in his type, or he's not 100% attracted but you've made yourself available that night and since he has already made SOME effort, it would be stupid for him just to go, so he starts kissing you and situation progresses.
Sex is decent. Hygienic. If you are lucky, even good+. A bit of inner rubbing for a short boost of endorphins. And then - immediately after - he zips up and goes his way. He ghosts you from the moment he exits your door.
Sometimes you are not bothered at all, thinking it was just a quickie.
Sometimes it leaves you with a questionable self-esteem, heavy, metallic, aftertaste all you don't really want to be perceived as hole, like a masturbation solution, like a sex dispenser, not good enough to be treated seriously - but it vanishes after a day or two, just like that man.
Weeks or months pass.
Then, out of a sudden, you receive a standard "Hey" + compliment on social media. The guy is back. Fresh and charming, like nothing happened, ready for round two.
I've been hitting this wall hundreds of times.
Yes, I give great blowjobs and handjobs but it doesn't mean I'll provide only because YOU want it.
It's SO objectifying and embarassing when men come back/beg/ask for sex and without even a single drop of respect to the person itself.
Treating women like sex dispensers is not cool.
Mistaking promiscuity with free of charge sex work is not cool.
This is the curse.
Sex is decent. Hygienic. If you are lucky, even good+. A bit of inner rubbing for a short boost of endorphins. And then - immediately after - he zips up and goes his way. He ghosts you from the moment he exits your door.
Sometimes you are not bothered at all, thinking it was just a quickie.
Sometimes it leaves you with a questionable self-esteem, heavy, metallic, aftertaste all you don't really want to be perceived as hole, like a masturbation solution, like a sex dispenser, not good enough to be treated seriously - but it vanishes after a day or two, just like that man.
Weeks or months pass.
Then, out of a sudden, you receive a standard "Hey" + compliment on social media. The guy is back. Fresh and charming, like nothing happened, ready for round two.
I've been hitting this wall hundreds of times.
Yes, I give great blowjobs and handjobs but it doesn't mean I'll provide only because YOU want it.
It's SO objectifying and embarassing when men come back/beg/ask for sex and without even a single drop of respect to the person itself.
Treating women like sex dispensers is not cool.
Mistaking promiscuity with free of charge sex work is not cool.
This is the curse.
4 years ago