Scared of Sex? Maybe...

Hey all, Jake here,

I have to decided to share something about myself that's pretty much known for several people. I am a virgin, that I haven't actually had sex beyond the online stuff or masturbation. Many of you might be wondering why I am a virgin, but consider myself bi-curious or even why I am one in the first place, considering my age.

Well, I guess I should open up that I have always bounced forth between the concept of me being bi or being gay but in denial. Anymore, I'm more open to saying that I am bi, though I think I prefer looking at guys in a sexual way. I'm still attracted to women, and I do think the concept of me having actual sex with a sexy lady is enticing, but at the same time, I can't deny the thought of feeling another man's cock in my mouth is a definite turn on.

So, why am I a virgin? Just haven't had too many opportunities for it, I guess. I'm the type of person who isn't a very outgoing type of person (I guess you could say that I am introverted), nor do I really want to take risks either. In a way, I'm scared of having sex in any way, but I also want to have it.

I think the fear comes more from where I live, as I live in a large town that is pretty religious in places, and homosexuality or bisexuality isn't exactly looked fondly in these parts. While I don't care what people would think of me if I was more open about my bi-curiosity, I would prefer not to be beaten up because of it. Also, I would like to start a family (though recently, that feels more like a pipe-dream since I am nearing my forties), and wanting to suck cock when you know you have k**s at home feels weird, even if the marriage was open.

Plus, I still need to get my driver's license and learn to drive, but that's another fear I need to overcome. I hope to see a counselor in a near future to see if I can overcome these various fears.

Anyway, I guess I just have to suck it up and take a plunge, eventually. I will practice safe sex (sorry folks, but I will only bareback if I know you are clean) and I try to make sure that I know the person, man or woman, will consent to having sex with me, especially considering my body (though I am loosing weight).

So, that's pretty much it, I guess I just need to open up about this whole thing a bit more. Sorry if I sound like a total loser, but if that's the case, you can kindly go fuck yourself! There's nothing wrong with being a virgin, though I'm not against having a bit of fun here and there either.

Later,

Jake aka PornKaiju2