32 Things not to say during sex

I saw this on FB and wanted to share it with you all, I think its hilarious!

1. But everybody looks funny naked!

2. You woke me up for that?

3. Did I mention the video camera?

4. Do you smell something burning?

5. (in a janitor's closet) And they say romance is dead...

6. Try breathing through your nose

7. A little rug burn ever hurt anyone!

8. Is that a Medic-Alert Pendant?

9. Sweetheart, did you lock the back door?

10. But whipped cream makes me break out

11. Person 1: This is your first time... right? Person 2: Yeah... today

12. (in the No Tell Motel) Hurry up! This room rents by the Hour!

13. Can you please pass me the remote control?

14. Do you accept Visa?

15. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

16. On second thought, let's turn off the lights.

17. And to think- I was really trying to pick up your friend!

18. So much for mouth-to-mouth.

19. (using body paint) Try not to leave any stains, okay?

20. Hope you're as good looking when I'm sober...

21. (holding a banana) It's just a little trick I learned at the zoo!

22. Do you get any premium movie channels?

23. Try not to smear my make-up, will ya!

24. (preparing to use peanut butter sexually) But I just steam-cleaned this couch!

25. Got any penicillin?

26. But I just brushed my teeth...

27. Smile, you're on Candid Camera!

28. I thought you had the keys to the handcuffs!

29. I want a baby!

30. So much for the fulfillment of sexual fantasies!

31. (in a menage a trois) Why am I doing all the work?

32. Maybe we should call Dr. Ruth...
Published by slave_ariana
13 years ago
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28
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-Snap-Crotch-Beaver-
best is went we say nothing [call it 'expected']
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frankestine
frankestine 10 years ago
lol some of those were funny
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divedog1960 10 years ago
nice...
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WALKINGWITHYOU
WALKINGWITHYOU 11 years ago
lol !!! excellent !!
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ognemoteb 12 years ago
kkkkkkkkk..., ADOREI!!! MUITO BOM...,
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slutsmaster1
slutsmaster1 12 years ago
that is great, very funny
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alexwd0
Very funny
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crzs
crzs 12 years ago
I can still remember # 29 from 40 years ago , but glad she was honest about it because I wasn't ready back then
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rionmoon
rionmoon 13 years ago
Funny!
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MrPadraig
ROTFLMAO!
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egines
egines 13 years ago
Very intereting and useful!
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curiouswe 13 years ago
Very funny. Even the wife (59yo) will like some of these.
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TMandrake
TMandrake 13 years ago
One to add:

MAN: Yes, yes, YESSSSS! Give it to me Renee!

WOMAN: My name is Nancy...
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horny-man 13 years ago
haha
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KCUM
KCUM 13 years ago
Very good!
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screwfix
screwfix 13 years ago
Quality
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VictorL4fun
VictorL4fun 13 years ago
I think #28 is what I dont want to hear
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andy5706 13 years ago
Someone elses name!!
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maxmanx4 13 years ago
enjoyed it emmensley thank you. lol michael..
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Club_4
Club_4 13 years ago
u forgot a couple;

is it supposed to burn?

but they both look like the holland tunnel.

what do you mean that little thing is so cute?

no baby, i would never do that.

why did you tie me up and who are all these people?

officer, can i go now?
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webborelly
webborelly 13 years ago
Nice post !
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Samsonight
Did you spy my bedroom?

ZZZZ...
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23tim 13 years ago
Those are hilarious. Thanks.
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slave_ariana
slave_ariana Publisher 13 years ago
@ Curlie Carly, Oops, that must have been a bit hairy! what happened?
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xXxPoistxXx
Hilarious Post Indeed. Fav. line "On second thought, let's turn off the lights."
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slave_ariana
slave_ariana Publisher 13 years ago
Thanks BBWsubtoy, lol
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slave_ariana
slave_ariana Publisher 13 years ago
lol I know, I so had to share it on here
A xxx
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azid619 13 years ago
Ha! That'd be hilarious to hear someone say that during sex :grinning: actually on second thoughts maybe not as funny if it's someone saying that to you during... lol
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