What?! Why?!

What is this thing that happens when a socionormative hetero male becomes suddenly entranced by the idea of becoming a feminized, submissive little sissy pet? According to the Internet, there are tons of us, prancing around in our garter belts and high heels, begging to be used as a cock puppet.
I'm married. Normal, hetero friends. I wear jeans. I drink beer right from the bottle.
Then there are those other times. My eyes nearly roll-up with arousal, the desire to dress up like a slut is an oxygen-like need. The craving always wins; the feeling of surrendering to it is too delicious to resist. I am conditioned to succumb.
What happened?! I used to be normal. Now I don't even want to be! I want to go DEEPER.
/h