A time in a club.
I was never a good looking person, I always knew that women would never throw themselves at my feet. But I did know the secret to a girl’s heart was through her ears, specifically by making her laugh. Ah, laughter, the key to unlocking doors and panties. Very quickly I learnt about reading a face, and matching a joke, a witticism, or even a quick, slapstick routine to the woman across from me. But I had another deeper problem. I was painfully shy. Comedy would open the door, but I could never follow through because my heart would be racing, my vision tunneled, my mouth would taste of copper. Fear was my wingman.
Then I met R. She was older than I was, independent, tiny, sexy. I met her late one night at the only club in town. She had just finished clambering up onto one of the ridiculously high bar stools, when a grown ass man unceremoniously shoved her off it. Ever the gentleman, I noticed that the stool next to me was empty, so I tapped her on the shoulder and moved stools, giving her my newly free one. In return she bought me a beer. Now I should mention that I was fairly drunk at this point, so I was able to talk freely. I thanked her for the beer, and told her how I hoped that the gorilla that shoved her off her original stool would somehow slip at the urinal, fall backwards and knock himself out with his dick out to the world. That made her laugh, I had a chance.
After a long conversation at that bar, she asked if I was single. Yes, I replied. She then asked me straight out if I found her attractive. Oh yes, I replied. Then she let me in on a secret. I used to pass her every day. It turned out that she worked in a restaurant that I visited nearly daily as a sous chef. After a couple more drinks, and shared work experience she told me straight to the point that I was going back to her place that night. What? We hadn’t even kissed! I was at a total loss. What the hell do I do now? I did what every young man would do or say. I said yes. And we left the club. On the way to the taxi rank I took a chance, grabbed her around the waist and bent over and kissed her. She didn’t kiss back. Oh fuck, here comes the slap I thought.
No slap came, instead she told me in a husky voice, catch me. And then she leapt up arms around my neck, mouth to my mouth, grinding her lower body against me. We must have stood like that for hours, in reality a few seconds, exploring each others mouths with our tongues. Eventually she wiggled free, and pulled me to the taxi. We got in, she told the driver where to take us, and we sat there, as far from each other as possible, eyes forward, ot a word leaving our lips.
We arrived at her place, I paid the taxi, and she lead me by the hand to her flat. Once in she immediately pulled me down for a case, wiggling her backside like an over excited labrador puppy. I was on cloud nine. A very attractive woman had brought me back to her place in the middle of the night. She pulled her mouth away from mine and told me to pick her up again and I did so. That is when I realised what the wiggling was about, she had shed her shoes, jeans and panties.
Holding her I turned and held her against the wall as I kissed and bit her neck. I enjoyed her moans. She then told me to carry her to the sofa, and I did. I sat down and had this delicious young lady naked from the waist down on my lap. Back then I was completely out of moves, if I knew then what I knew now, maybe things would be different.I felt her hands at my belt, at my zipper. She whispered in my ear, asking if I had protection. In my wallet, back right pocket I whispered back. She quickly pulled out my wallet, got the condom out and on me before I could say or do anything. Then with another wiggle and a moan, I was in her. She rode me gently, looking me in the eyes, I quickly started to pull her shirt up and off while at the same time cursing myself for wearing boots with tight laces. Then the dreaded bra. To this day I still battle with bras. I love to hate them, and their microscopic hooks. After an age of fumbling she reached behind her and in a quick movement had her bra off, like magic. She shoved her breasts at me, nipple into my mouth. And that is when I heard it. A low, rhythmic panting. First soft but slowly amplifying. I felt her mouth at my neck, her teeth digging into the flesh. And the gasping between the clenched jaw.
After she had climaxed she rolled off of me, still panting, her chest with her beautiful small breasts heaving. The sweat glistened on her body. She climbed next to me on the sofa, arms on the back rest. Take me from behind, she moaned and I obliged. Sliding into her wet, tight body I knew I wouldn’t last, and I told her. But she didn’t care, harder, she screamed, faster she squealed. And in no time at all, I was done.
I collapsed on the sofa next to her, and pulled her onto my lap. We sat there kissing and touching each other. She told me things and I returned the favour. That’s when she noticed my jeans, knotted, twisted, tangled around my ankles. As she started giggling she asked if the had been on the whole time, laughing I said yes, I said that they had bonded me to her. She laughed hard at this and got down to first untie those damned boots and then to help me take off the jeans.
She covered herself in a shawl, and gave me a towel to wrap around my waist and we went out onto the balcony for a smoke. And that is when she told me how she saw my friends and I always come to her place of work, and that she noticed that I would always have a serious look on my face, say something and have all of the guys laughing. She said that it always made her horny watching me make them laugh. And that one day she met one of the guys outside of work and found out that I loved going to the club and that is how she ended up that night.
So that confirmed my theory, that the quickest way into a ladies panties is to make her laugh. And from that day on, that has been my go to method. It isn’t always easy, and it takes a lot of time. But 9 out of 7 times it does work.
R and I dated on and off for a couple of years after that. And it still makes me said when I remember the day she told me that she found another man to make her laugh. But at least I have lots of good memories, and a few more stories about her. If I was to ever go back in time though, I have a lot of tips for my younger self.
Then I met R. She was older than I was, independent, tiny, sexy. I met her late one night at the only club in town. She had just finished clambering up onto one of the ridiculously high bar stools, when a grown ass man unceremoniously shoved her off it. Ever the gentleman, I noticed that the stool next to me was empty, so I tapped her on the shoulder and moved stools, giving her my newly free one. In return she bought me a beer. Now I should mention that I was fairly drunk at this point, so I was able to talk freely. I thanked her for the beer, and told her how I hoped that the gorilla that shoved her off her original stool would somehow slip at the urinal, fall backwards and knock himself out with his dick out to the world. That made her laugh, I had a chance.
After a long conversation at that bar, she asked if I was single. Yes, I replied. She then asked me straight out if I found her attractive. Oh yes, I replied. Then she let me in on a secret. I used to pass her every day. It turned out that she worked in a restaurant that I visited nearly daily as a sous chef. After a couple more drinks, and shared work experience she told me straight to the point that I was going back to her place that night. What? We hadn’t even kissed! I was at a total loss. What the hell do I do now? I did what every young man would do or say. I said yes. And we left the club. On the way to the taxi rank I took a chance, grabbed her around the waist and bent over and kissed her. She didn’t kiss back. Oh fuck, here comes the slap I thought.
No slap came, instead she told me in a husky voice, catch me. And then she leapt up arms around my neck, mouth to my mouth, grinding her lower body against me. We must have stood like that for hours, in reality a few seconds, exploring each others mouths with our tongues. Eventually she wiggled free, and pulled me to the taxi. We got in, she told the driver where to take us, and we sat there, as far from each other as possible, eyes forward, ot a word leaving our lips.
We arrived at her place, I paid the taxi, and she lead me by the hand to her flat. Once in she immediately pulled me down for a case, wiggling her backside like an over excited labrador puppy. I was on cloud nine. A very attractive woman had brought me back to her place in the middle of the night. She pulled her mouth away from mine and told me to pick her up again and I did so. That is when I realised what the wiggling was about, she had shed her shoes, jeans and panties.
Holding her I turned and held her against the wall as I kissed and bit her neck. I enjoyed her moans. She then told me to carry her to the sofa, and I did. I sat down and had this delicious young lady naked from the waist down on my lap. Back then I was completely out of moves, if I knew then what I knew now, maybe things would be different.I felt her hands at my belt, at my zipper. She whispered in my ear, asking if I had protection. In my wallet, back right pocket I whispered back. She quickly pulled out my wallet, got the condom out and on me before I could say or do anything. Then with another wiggle and a moan, I was in her. She rode me gently, looking me in the eyes, I quickly started to pull her shirt up and off while at the same time cursing myself for wearing boots with tight laces. Then the dreaded bra. To this day I still battle with bras. I love to hate them, and their microscopic hooks. After an age of fumbling she reached behind her and in a quick movement had her bra off, like magic. She shoved her breasts at me, nipple into my mouth. And that is when I heard it. A low, rhythmic panting. First soft but slowly amplifying. I felt her mouth at my neck, her teeth digging into the flesh. And the gasping between the clenched jaw.
After she had climaxed she rolled off of me, still panting, her chest with her beautiful small breasts heaving. The sweat glistened on her body. She climbed next to me on the sofa, arms on the back rest. Take me from behind, she moaned and I obliged. Sliding into her wet, tight body I knew I wouldn’t last, and I told her. But she didn’t care, harder, she screamed, faster she squealed. And in no time at all, I was done.
I collapsed on the sofa next to her, and pulled her onto my lap. We sat there kissing and touching each other. She told me things and I returned the favour. That’s when she noticed my jeans, knotted, twisted, tangled around my ankles. As she started giggling she asked if the had been on the whole time, laughing I said yes, I said that they had bonded me to her. She laughed hard at this and got down to first untie those damned boots and then to help me take off the jeans.
She covered herself in a shawl, and gave me a towel to wrap around my waist and we went out onto the balcony for a smoke. And that is when she told me how she saw my friends and I always come to her place of work, and that she noticed that I would always have a serious look on my face, say something and have all of the guys laughing. She said that it always made her horny watching me make them laugh. And that one day she met one of the guys outside of work and found out that I loved going to the club and that is how she ended up that night.
So that confirmed my theory, that the quickest way into a ladies panties is to make her laugh. And from that day on, that has been my go to method. It isn’t always easy, and it takes a lot of time. But 9 out of 7 times it does work.
R and I dated on and off for a couple of years after that. And it still makes me said when I remember the day she told me that she found another man to make her laugh. But at least I have lots of good memories, and a few more stories about her. If I was to ever go back in time though, I have a lot of tips for my younger self.
3 years ago